Feeling Angry

In a complicated fast moving world people with many people with co-morbidities, those with a MH DX are often hardest hit. I can relate to a lot of what you are saying and feeling. I too had to do all the dirty work while certain people were getting all the mh support. Part of the answer lies ... in getting your health needs recognised .. and being canny about how you put responsibility back onto your spouse.

In both my family of orogin and creation there were lots of people with different Dx.

On the other hard there is a "new" understanding about BPD which gives hope. That we are not to treat it with so much stigma and the sufferers as insincere. I KNOW there is a lot of work to be done by clinicians in getting the balance right for families.There is also work to be done by the BPD sufferer... Not letting the BPD sufferer "get away" with everything but also give them necessary leeway in order to process their feelings,ie "do the therapuetic work" and support the family realistically, given the person/family's resources.

Good Luck. Backing and support for Carers is a good move and a small part of the answer, but not the whole answer. Find a local Carer's organisation ???

Hi @Snowflake86,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for sharing your experience. Trying to manage emotions when battling with a mental illness is so so hard. I can understand that trying to manage emotions if one is also trying to support a partner who has reccently been diagnosed would be even more challenging. Having a short temper right now is understandable.

@Determined has spoken about thier partners BPD diagnosis, and might be able to offer some wisdom and empathy?

Thankyou, sometimes just the fact that other people can see reasoning to my emotions is enough to be able to then look at it from a different point of view. Its like swings and roundabouts these days but i am so very thankful that my partner can communicate with me and that although we may have a rough few days we always then go back over what the causes were etc so thankyou for understanding 🙂

Hi @Snowflake86 welcome to the forum

sorry it has taken me such a long time to respond, it has been a rough couple of days here.

As @Former-Member mentioned I support my wife who lives with BPD so I can relate to the emotions that you have shared here.

The best advise I can offer is to make sure you are looking after you,

Do you have family or friends who can support you or you can just talk about your fears and emotions?

Seeing a councillor or psychologist is also a very good idea. I say this as I did not look after myself and suffered burnout as a result this has affected my ability not only to provide for my family but to stay calm and consistently support my wife .

Happy to answer any specific questions you may have.

This thread here is some of our story that may be of some benifit to you.

Take care.

@Determined I don't know how you do it, i've lived with my partner for all of 6 months and my mental health has declined to the point of me having to leave, although i spent 12 years in a marriage that was also toxic but in other ways so i guess i know what i will and won't allow myself to go through 😞 you are a very very strong person, ive read your entire blog so far and its amazing what you go through and still come out at the end of the day with some form of hope etc.