My special place

hey @Eve7 so sorry to hear it's been rough for you too, sitting with you both and sending some love. 💗

what do you think will be helpful in keeping you safe tonight? do you reckon reaching out to a crisis line might be helpful? or distraction chats? let me know what you'd prefer, here for you.

@Snowie

@rav3n I don't know if that is directed to me or Eve.

Sorry @Eve7 I didn't see what you wrote. Please know I care about you

Im sorry for what I write on your thread @Snowie . I am safe for now but I need help.

Never be sorry for writing what you feel @Eve7 No one owns a thread hon. It is here for everyone.

Can you call? Or text? Or write on here?

I’ve called Ll @Snowie

the cue cards sound like a great tool @Snowie and totally get that even with those reasons written down, it can be hard not think 'is this enough?' i think that brains that have experienced trauma tend to find it much easier to hold onto reasons not to fight, then reasons to stay - and even though our brain thinks this way, it doesn't mean it's right, and unfortunately, it takes up more of our energy to challenge it.

it's tricky with guilt - the switch between something motivating us to making us feel guilty can be so quick. even family, they can push you keep going but they can sometimes feel like a burden. you're allowed to feel thankful and exhausted at the same time, i know i sure do. i think we have this pressure to only feel/portray the good emotions, but realistically life's a bit more complicated than that and we might feel a mix of emotions - and that's totally okay too. it's normal to feel contradicting emotions, and i think giving us the space to allow that and know its okay is important too. even if people have different situations to you, your reality and experience of pain is real too - your feelings are ALWAYS valid. we can't always control what we feel, and it's okay to let those feelings in - but we can control what we act on.

also the last post i was supposed to tag you after the first sentence, the last part was for Eve7 - sorry for the confusion!

I really hope it helps @Eve7

thanks for letting us know you're safe for now @Eve7 and really glad to hear you've called LL, i know that must've taken a lot of strength. sitting with you 💗

Thanks again @rav3n for your views and input. Thank you for taking the time to respond.

It certainly is more tiring trying to keep my brain thinking positively.

That burden alone feels like it can push me over the edge, especially when you are constantly told to think of your family.

That lack of control scares me.

I'm going to have to go. Thank you for listening and helping me. I don't want you to think it was in vain.

no worries at all @Snowie it's a tough but important conversation to have, and i'm always happy to sit with you. 💙

i'm just going to flick through a quick check-in email before you head off so keep an eye out for that