My special place

Hopefully the walking is helping your ankle @Eve7

Dinner sounds yummy. Glad S1 is cooking tea. I have had hello fresh before and the meals were always good. The kids love them.

Have you got any plans for tomorrow?

Tomorrow I’ll go to work, physio, training and bed @Snowie

I really like Hello Fresh too. Do your kids ever cook for you?

My gs1 had a seizure the other night which frightened the life out of us all. Hospital couldn’t find any cause so it’s a mystery. He has follow up with neurologist.

Sounds like a busy day for you @Eve7 I hope it all goes well for you.

D sometimes cooks, she likes to. She will make tea and also cookies and cakes. I will never say no to someone else cooking for me!!

Sorry to hear about gs1. Hopefully the neurologist can give you some answers and he doesn't have any more.

Am going to go get into bed. Have taken as much prn as I am allowed and my meds so hoping that it helps me sleep.

Thanks for keeping me company hon, I really appreciate it.

Have a good day tomorrow and lots of love and hugs 💗💗

Good night @Snowie and sweet dreams 😴

You are one day closer to skiing 💜❄️☃️❄️💜

Sorry to hear yesterday was awful for you @Snowie 😞

Yet you still managed to cook a lasagna! Wow (I couldn't cook a lasagna if you paid me a thousand dollars - I'm a terrible cook)!

Happy to hear that you're going to the snow this weekend...hope nothing gets in the way of that 💜

@Eve7 that's not good about no IT access at work, and also your gs1's seizure! I hope the neurologist can help.

Hopefully you have IT access today...

Sending 💛

Thinking of you today @Snowie and hoping you were able to get an appointment so you can then enjoy a weekend of skiing ⛷ in the 🥶 cold 🥶 snow.

Lots of love

💙🥶⛷☃️❄️☃️⛷🥶💙

@Snowie hoping you're at the snow right now and can have your favourite type of weekend 💙

Hi @NatureLover @Eve7

Thank you for thinking of me 💕💕

I struggled with if I should even be writing this as so many people going through a lot themselves in their real life.

But here goes.

Firstly, don't tell me my friends and family would be devastated if I did something to myself. Do they really think I don't think about that and the implications of the. The guilt carried around this is immense.

Secondly, I feel like I am failing at my job. If I can't help myself then how do I help others. I can sit here a cite sayings, show helpful pictures, connect them to other sites and even tell them they can get trough these things. But how do I believe In all of this when I barely believe it myself.

My self worth is not exisdent at this time. My dedication to myself has gone. I am afraid of where i am heading and most afraid of those persistent thoughts.

Will sit with this, probably regret it and delete it.