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Depression Dementia Dad

Unknown userMember31 Jan 2018, 10:01 pm AEDT

Depression Dementia Dad

Is Dementia Mental Illness? It's a disease of the mind so i'm hoping i still belong here. If not for that - today at the DR he was asked if he gets depression - dad answered "yes I do get depressed" It's hard to read with dad's early vascular dementia.

Around Christmas i moved in with my parents as mum was unable to manage hersef let alone continue as dad's carer. She was end stage cancer and died in hospital palliative care only 19 days after i arrived 😞 I was shocked how sick she became in the 2months since my last three week trip.. My goodness - what a fighter she was. My two younger brothers were dropping in a couple of times a day & helped with transport, bills & shopping - but could not stay in the house.longer than 30min - becoming restless... (probably the MI-Sz / drug related) and they were wearing thin. getting angry.. Mum was so difficult / hurtful during my last stay to help, i was reluctant to come again unless she asked me to. It was hard for her but necessary. The first attempt to drive the 1200km i ran off the road & badly crashed my car - a 'Write Off' Sore bones & shellshot - I had to rest a few days before flew down.

I hit the floor running - household duties, neals & loads of patient reassurance for mum. Even giving her a bell. Wasnt easy looking them both, clearly dad had been neglected for sone time.

I was still in the bad books for reporting him as a medically 'unfit' driver during my last stay. They fought it and gad x2 doctors confer ( why not done before is beyond me).

So here i am, feeling alone with 'toxic family' threatened by my presence, the loss of my mum, a dad in grief, with early vascular dementia, diabetes, heart disease, spinal injury - poor mobility, bad incontinence. Its full on some days. Not just the cleaning up but all the medical appointments. Especially since mum had understandablly got behind on things like optometrist, pidiatrist... even the GP...

Just looking for support as feeling somewhat shattered after only x5 weeks. Big day today.

lapses

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In response to: Depression Dementia Dad

Unknown userMember14 Nov 2018, 1:26 pm AEDT

Re: Depression Dementia Dad

In response to: Depression Dementia Dad

outlanderSenior Contributor16 Nov 2018, 9:32 am AEDT

Re: Depression Dementia Dad

@Former-Memberthinking of you

In response to: Re: Depression Dementia Dad

Unknown userMember19 Nov 2018, 4:31 pm AEDT

Re: Depression Dementia Dad

I was was just talking with Public Guardian and jumped online for support because I have all these mixed feelings everywhere with her freaking out over hearing dad has 27steps into his home here, and her tone changed saying “I will be coming to a decision by the end of the week” Pretty much made up her mind to make him PERMANENT. I saw it coming but it’s upsetting, and I feel mixed up. But I really must go offline and shower & get some more groceries, diet shakes & visit dad.

In response to: Re: Depression Dementia Dad

Unknown userMember20 Nov 2018, 2:58 am AEDT

Re: Depression Dementia Dad

Didn’t visit dad, had a fainting spell taking a shower. Blood pressure I think and this diet. Need to ease up a bit.

Bro4 said he’d been in to see dad y’day and I have to go wed AM, is that enough? I’m not sure he remembers. It’s so hard now he can’t carry a conversation and forgets who I am.

At least I forded Public Guardian to investigate dad care at home (she’s contacted all dad’s services, confirmed with ALL of them I was a caring daughter with dad, she said), and the record has been set straight / put right (after Bro2 & sis grossly misrepresenting me, and the situation. I don’t know. Tried to talk about this on the other side but, well, let’s just say MI causes much self absorption

Oh my goodness
This dog is snoring so loud on my bed lol
How could such a cute little fur baby girl be so loud lol

In response to: Re: Depression Dementia Dad

outlanderSenior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 6:39 pm AEDT

Re: Depression Dementia Dad

Evening @Former-Member
Maybe its worth speaking to your gp about your fainting spells? It doesnt sound very good and maybe the dr could help with bp meds or something depending on what they find?

It's about bloody time someone set the record straight. Finally someones seeing what we see here and that is the good stuff not what your family has been saying. I really wish they hadnt of done that in the first place though, so unnecessary. They really must have a lot of guilt to have dragged your name through the dirt.

Your dog sounds cute, we had a loud snoring pup too she also use to 'run' in her sleep probably chasing birda or rabbits lol!

In response to: Re: Depression Dementia Dad

DeterminedSenior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 9:07 pm AEDT

Re: Depression Dementia Dad

@Former-Member

Thinking of you.

In response to: Re: Depression Dementia Dad

Unknown userMember23 Nov 2018, 1:22 pm AEDT

Re: Depression Dementia Dad

Checking in @Former-Member

In response to: Re: Depression Dementia Dad

Unknown userMember23 Nov 2018, 9:03 pm AEDT

Re: Depression Dementia Dad

@Former-Member TNX, Arrived 6pm @ holiday cottage on the NSW south coast. Lots of traffic but steady run. Brang a chch friend, lovely lady. Lobely town, so much water in a he sea lol and so blue 🙂 We had Tai for tea :). How are you?

In response to: Re: Depression Dementia Dad

Unknown userMember23 Nov 2018, 9:12 pm AEDT

Re: Depression Dementia Dad

Hi @outlander, how are you?

In response to: Re: Depression Dementia Dad

outlanderSenior Contributor23 Nov 2018, 9:15 pm AEDT

Re: Depression Dementia Dad

evening @Former-Member
the cottage where your staying sounds really lovely. the south coast is a very nice place to be isnt it. we occassionally travel south for holidays, most with white sandy beaches and clear blue water
if your lucky, you may see some dolphins or whales but they mightve already passed through for the season

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.