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Supporting a partner in a crisis

JacquesSenior Contributor26 Jan 2018, 8:23 pm AEDT

Supporting a partner in a crisis

hi everyone, i really don't know where else to turn, this is the first time i have bene on the carers forum, my partner is suicidal and she almost made an attempt 2 days ago, she had to change meds because of the warf strike preventing her meds comming into aus, and the ones she is on now have made her really unwell, she can't make phone calls and she is scared of police comming to her house. i have tried contacting so many people to get her into a MHU, i have talked her into going volintarily, but their is no way that i can find to get her their.

please help

Jacques

540 replies

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In response to: Supporting a partner in a crisis

outlanderSenior Contributor02 Feb 2020, 9:02 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

evening @Jacques
wondering how things are going for you?

In response to: Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

JacquesSenior Contributor02 Feb 2020, 9:42 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

Hi @outlander thank you so much for thinking of me.

im ok, i have made it through the week long heat wave.

my partner is having trouble with her daughter, behavioural. she it hitting and swearing and just making things really uncomfortable. im trying to find something to help her manage her daughter. she has her at a psych but they said if her daughter is not willing to work with them then there is not much they can do.

i have been having a lot of issues sleeping lately, some anxiety and some nights just the heat.

how are you my friend? how are things going for you?

In response to: Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

outlanderSenior Contributor02 Feb 2020, 10:11 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

hey @Jacques
im often thinking of you and wondering how things are.
gosh we had an awful heatwave here too but thankfully the fire threats have been contained so its a little less stress but today we had a heap of rain and at one point I had to pull over because the roads were starting to flood and couldn't see as the rain was so heavy!

oh that's really tough about your step daughter. its hard to help someone when they don't want to help themselves. has she been diagnosed with anything? has she said why she is acting out at all like is it something happening at school etc? if shes not normally like this then maybe theres a hidden reason?

sleep often evades me too though I have chronic insomnia so its not really unusual for me but your right the heat does play a huge part in how we sleep.
have you got anything that might help you sleep like gentle music or a meditation app or even some essential oils to try?

umm things are quite tough both within myself and on the carer front as well. my mental health isn't to bad and my physical health atm is quite bad and trying to get in to see a gp soon, had to call a home dr for the same reason just 2 days ago but its not going away.
and of course being a carer of someone with dementia brings about its own daily challenges hey.

In response to: Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

JacquesSenior Contributor03 Feb 2020, 10:23 am AEDT

Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

hi @outlander oh im so glad the fires have eased up a bit, it has been so crazy this summer, i have never seen fires so bad and so wide spread before. we have never experianced a whole summer above 40 before here. it was truly awful.

we have not had a great deal of rain, but we have had some so im grateful, probably 50mm for the month.

yes, she has PTSD anxiety and depression because her father was abusive to them. but she has never acted out like this before, it has only been the past 2 months. she is friends with a really rough girl, so we are not sure if that is causing the problem or if it is something more.

yes, i think i have insomnia too, i just can't seem to sleep much. i just worry how it is afecting my mental health as i get very low when i am so so exhausted.

oh im so sorry to hear that @outlander , please look after yourself, i know the burdens of being a ful ltime carer. my dad had Motor Neuron Disease. it is physically and mentally exhausting having to be alert 24/7 have you thought of looking into respite? maybe once a week just to give you some you time?

you need to look after yourself @outlander if your not at your best you can't care to the best of your ability. i learned that the hard way. hugs my dear friend.

Jacques

In response to: Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

outlanderSenior Contributor04 Feb 2020, 6:29 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

yeah this summer has been pretty bad @Jacques in our area we are expecting around 200 maybe more mls of rain over the next 10 days. im hoping that we get a lot of rain we need to fill up our dams and stuff that's for sure.

oh I see, im sorry to hear about the abusive father and the diagnoses. its really tough having ptsd, anxiety and depression, I have those too. hmm maybe the new girl is having abit of influence on her. kids and young teens esp are so easily influenced esp when they are feeling troubled themselves. I hope that she will come back around soon and accept the help that's on offer.

maybe have a chat with your gp about medications for some sleep? its hard when theres so little sleep happening isn't there

im currently in the process of trying to sort out some supports for him through my aged care but it takes such a long time, we are still at the first step so ive contacted them to find out what happens now since the papers have been there since November but haven't heard anything.
I cant get any other supports until he gets assessed and things so its making it quite tiring. yesterday was a particularly bad day with him giving me death threats. he doesn't mean it and im still safe but hearing him say those things is quite hard. I take him back to his geriatrician next month so im going to have a private chat with them about his progress and then go from there.

In response to: Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

Shaz51Senior Contributor04 Feb 2020, 7:18 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

hello @outlander . @Jacques

how are you tonight

I am very tired but ok xx

In response to: Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

outlanderSenior Contributor04 Feb 2020, 10:34 pm AEDT

Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

hope you get some sleep @Shaz51 xo

In response to: Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

Shaz51Senior Contributor05 Feb 2020, 8:30 am AEDT

Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

morning @outlander , @Jacques , @Appleblossom , @Former-Member

busy tring to get jobs done before more rain coming tomorrow

In response to: Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

outlanderSenior Contributor05 Feb 2020, 8:45 am AEDT

Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

hope you get what you need to do done @Shaz51 maybe with the rain coming itll give you a day or 2 of rest too

In response to: Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

JacquesSenior Contributor05 Feb 2020, 11:36 am AEDT

Re: Supporting a partner in a crisis

hi @outlander and @Shaz51 , i am very tired, mum had her operation for cateract yestrday, everything went well.

yes @Shaz51 we have 50-100 mm comming over the next few days, so im so so excited for some rain, a lot of farmers in the central west NSW are digging new dams and or making existing ones deeper ready for the next big rains.

hugs my dear friend @outlander im glad you are taking time to look after yoursefl physically, it is so so important. i hope the doctors can give you the best treatment possible to get you back feeling 100%

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