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Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

This thread is a follow on (or starting over) from my previous thread Caring for a wife with borderline personality disorder – sequel to diary of wife's hospital stay, I wanted to start over and in order to leave all the trauma and negativity of last year behind me and start fresh.

Those of you who have been following our family journey will know that after a number of hospital admissions for my darling I was encouraged by my councillor to implement some boundaries (lovingly implemented guidelines, not rules to be enforced) as well as self-care for myself as what we were doing was clearly not working and my health was /still is being affected.

Well after a smoother than expected start the boundaries and self-care were forgotten with my darling having a complete melt down and further lengthy hospital admissions due to high risk of self harm and a genuine attempt to leave us. The last 6 months particularly have been quite difficult for us all. S2 particularly had a lot of issues at school during this time and is currently seeing a councillor.

The purpose of this new thread is to again document our journey of healing, working on implemented boundaries and commitment to self care. As with the previous thread this is so that I can have a visual plan for myself with some accountability to follow through with plans in place and in the hope that it may help others in similar situations to ours. And so that I can track our progress. This was especially helpful in the last thread leading up to Christmas when I was feeling down about our current position to review what I had written and see just how far we have come.

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In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

So @Determined, does this mean you're at the "I want to go to sleep until it's all sorted out" stage...? Been there.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Kind of @Smc except all of my problems are my own. I could very easily just throw the towel in with uni and give up but then I would be more depressed later at yet another failure.

Have an exam tomorrow @Smc and going over review notes today it really is beyond me.

Then a report in 1 week that also seems out of reach. I am just so tired and depressed I can't recall or apply any information.

If I at least try and fail then at least I have tried.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Got it. Do what you can, we'll be thinking of you and praying.
Better get some sleep? Tired brains don't have much recall capacity.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

@Determined

How did you get on today Bro?

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Complete flop @Former-Member

Was initially relieved and excited when reading the questions in perusal. All the things I had been focusing on in prep was there but then come time to answer... Could not come up with anything.

My brain is so exhausted I feel I can not even achieve the most basic tasks 😫

Have a week now to finish a report that is well beyond me. No idea what I am going to do with that ☹

In response to: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Checking in @Determined

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Still feeling flat here @Former-Member

Struggling with some assessment that I have resigned to failing. Due 5pm tomorrow.

Exam last week was a total loss also

Just don't have any capacity atm ☹

Hoping I can at least pass both subjects.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Seems atm the only time I am not feeling overwhelmed is when I am out walking.

While that has its health benefits I can't be walking all the time.

It does however shed some light on how darling became so obsessed with her cycling leading up to her crisis.

In response to: Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Re: Supporting my wife who lives with Borderline Personality Disorder while maintaining self care.

Well I got my assessment submitted. Less than 50% complete but hoping it will be enough to pass the subject.

It is combination of disappointed in myself for the sub par effort and relief that deadline has passed and what is done is done.

Darling and FIL are heading off on a road trip tomorrow so it will be me and the boys for the next week.

Glad I don't have the assessment hanging over me so that I can focus on our boys who will be missing their mum.

At least this time her absence is not under duress. I was contemplating that recently and the flood of emotions rattled me a bit. It proves that emotions are buried rather than dealt with, something to discuss at my next counselling appointment,

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