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Help

countrymummy85New Contributor11 Jan 2018, 7:32 pm AEDT

Help

Hi I'm 32 I have autoimmune thyroid disease. I am a mum of four, in a crappy relationship and I am pretty depressed. My partner is autistic and does not give me any emotional support. I am trying to take each day as it comes, but each day ends and I am in no better frame of mind. I have had suicidal thoughts, but I know that if I just got out of this relationship I would be half way there. I am regularly left to care for two young children mostly on my own. I feel isolated as I am half hour from town. I have no close friends in the small town that I live in, and I have strong suspicions my husband has had numerous mistresses. I have seen a women's health counselor, and her opinion is to leave. It's never going to get better. There is so much more I want out of life, but my husband has no compassion or interest in making sure my emotional needs are met aswell. He is very selfish. I had depression as a teenager. I just feel sometimes there is nothing for me. No one cares about me or bothers to really get to know me. I am struggling and that's rubbing off on my kids.

3 replies

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In response to: Help

Unknown userMember11 Jan 2018, 8:21 pm AEDT

Re: Help

Hi @countrymummy85

A very warm welcome to Sane. It is very hard when we feel alone in our struggles - please know you are not alone here. I also have an autoimmune thyroid disease "Hashimotto". It does make me feel tired at times but the treatment I am on, physical exercise and good nutrition seems to help. But like with any physical or mental illness, stress makes it worse. So finding better ways to either avoid or deal better with the latter will help your thyroid function.

It sounds like the relationship with your partner is rocky - I can't advise there only to say to follow your heart. It will guide you with the help of your psychologist. When one is giving most of the time and the other is just taking and not respecting us as individuals - this over time will emotionally deplete us and drag down our sense of worth and self esteem. It sounds like you are at that point and self care and protection is the priority then. Doing what you believe is best for you and your children.

Its wonderful that you are reaching out for support. Please know you are not alone here and others do care.

In response to: Help

QueenieSenior Contributor11 Jan 2018, 9:12 pm AEDT

Re: Help

Good evening @countrymummy85 and welcome to SANE forums.

Like yourself and @Former-Member, I also live with an autoimmune thyroid condition (it runs in my family unfortunately). I know that triggers like mental health issues and stressful situations can make thyroid issues worse and in turn, thyroid issues can make mental health issues and the ability to cope with stress much harder. Being without close friends nearby and being isolated in a regional community will definitely not help your level of coping at all.

I can't tell you to leave your husband, but I can say you've obviously done quite a bit of soul searching about the subject. I say the same as -Enigma-, follow your heart. You need to be nurtured and loved, the same as your kids do.

I'm sure here on the boards, you'll find many people who you can relate to. The beauty of these boards is that although you remain anonymous, you're never alone in your journey.

In response to: Re: Help

Unknown userMember11 Jan 2018, 9:26 pm AEDT

Re: Help

Hi @countrymummy85 - i'm sorry to hear about how hard things are for you right now. I had an unhappy marriage and there was DV as well and it took me a long time to leave. I've been gone for around 4 and half years now and slowly some parts of my life have come together in different ways though its not easy. I dont have family either and have had to move a few times in the last few years but settled in a large regional town now which makes a lot of things easier. I dont want to say to leave but do trust your instincts and that it is possible to be a single mamma and survive, though its really hard too. I remember thinking that there was no way that I could be a single mum... but in many ways the day to day aspect of my life got a lot easier because i wasnt looking after him or having to keep to his schedules/needs etc day to day aspects of my life were easier. And like you, he wasnt any support or help in the parenting side of things. It's not easy though. I'm glad you are here, and hope that the forums are a helpful place to you. Take care

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