Don't know how to move forward

Hi @Janey208.

I just wanted to say a quick hi and welcome to the forum. My situation is not the same as yours but I'm in a similar position and age and stage of life. I was just having a quick look at the forums and unfortunately I can't write much now (I have lots going on in my life) but just wanted to let you know you are not alone. I hope to respond more fully later.

Best wishes. 💜😊

Hi @Janey208

Thanks for sharing your story - I read it with great interest. I really admire the selfless love and strength you exhibited throughout your married life for the sake and well being of your children. They were so lucky to have a mother like you. That immediately tells me what a special person you are and that anyone would be lucky as well to have a friend like you. You are loyal, caring and dedicated - these qualities are the essence of good friendship. You have a lot going for you.

But the abuse you have endured over the years from your husband has taken a total on your self esteem and confidence. It's now just a matter of building those two back up again.

There are many things you can do at your age to make a new life and friends. I am not sure if you work but have you ever considered volunteer work in something that matters to you? A great way to meet friends. As is joining interest or exercise groups in your area to mention some. You can google what's around in your area. And when you first go remember how proud you are of your achievements with your children - the good person you are and hold your head up. It's who we are that really matters - and those who matter will come to like you for who you are. We do all need a friend, and when you venture out you will eventually meet people looking for the same thing as well. Looking for you.

If you are unhappy with your state of health from the stress you've endured - you can turn that around if you wish also. All in baby steps working up to a place you feel comfortable with. Perhaps starting with making a plan to ease into daily exercise and healthy eating habits looking after and being kind to you. Join a gym if you need some motivation - all ages go to them. I know that when I am fit this does increase my confidence. And the sense of achievement in the end feels so good. It could be something as small as a walk around the block to start with....and build up to what you are satisfied with.

And we extend our hand in support and friendship here for as long as you need. A warm welcome to Sane. 🤗

H @Janey208 we met briefly on my thread. Good on you for getting the courage to post, it's so hard to do. I hope you can tick it up as a huge success. @Former-Member has mentioned helpful suggestions.

I too had an abusive husband but no children. I know this changes everything. You have been brave to leave so much behind, now it's finding ways of rebuilding. As you will have picked up on my thread, I'm rebuilding. My steps are small and I've started with my garden. It might not be of interest to you but it's a simple and close, being outside the door interest. Unfortunately I'm not up to the meeting people yet, but there are community gardens around where others are there also.

There are other threads where you might get to know others faster like. The morning thread...the book thread.. The yoga thread...the walking thread...and other animal threads, just a light way of getting to know people. Take care. Sending warm thoughts.😀😀