Leroy58

I have no friends! My ex wife ejected me out of the house just prior to a Laminectomy and then Hip replacement. She had finally returned to work after having 4 kids over 20 years and was earning 200K. A lot more than me as a ptimary school teacher. When asked by a counsellor why she wanted me out she said 'she didn't trust me'. When the counsellor asked why after 23 years of marriage she felt that way, she refused to answer, her friend had told her that she didn't have to say. Fair enough. I moved to my parents because after 23 years I really only have my family. My old school father then say's that I'm not a man because I let my wife force me out of my house and he kicks me out because I have to have a laminectomy (fusing Vertabrae together). I could no longer feel my legs and was 8 cm shorter than 6 months earlier. My sister kindly allowed me to move into her house. I have some of my 4 kids visit on occassion. So I needed two rooms on rare occassions. I have now discovered that I was paying 2/3rds of her mortgage and she now also owns an investment property and holiday caravan.

After moving into my sisters I ended up having the Laminectomy and an emergency hip replacement ( I need the other replaced next year). My principal at school believes that I don't pull my weight. He arrived whilst I was taking LSL to help my wife establish her company. I have produced two Australian champions in Long Jump 4 years apart a girl and a boy, both with refugee backgrounds in a school of 300. Neither had been trained before and one is now an Australian record holder. I had to arrange for funding through Multi cultural organisations and the SSV because they didn't have the money to go. I have also been directly responsible for over $180,000.00 of capital works grants ( Solar Panels, Water Tanks and refurbishment and upgrade of our irrigation system) and around $20,000.00 in sports related student grants. The principal was head hunted from private enterprise because of his maths background but has never spent time in the classroom beyond his initial training. He has worked as an administrator since day one. I was subsequently forced to take a year leave without pay as he has told me that he will not make life easy for me if I stay. At 57 and with the physical problems that I had no choice but to take the action I have. If I return he will force me to be the PE teacher and place me under intense scrutiny. The person who is replacing me this year is the student that I mentored in his final year of study and is using all the protocols that I had developed. Apparently they are happy with his work, but when I did it the leadership was unhappy. They save $38,000.00 when he does it.

I have been under constant doctor's care since October last year due to ongoing issues with my back and hip, and now my other Hip as well. I have had to start working as a Replacement Teacher to supplement the little money I now have left from the divorce settlement. My sister has asked me to move out of the house because I have stayed there for 3 years now and she has paid off her house. I have to give my final answer on what I want to do next year with the school I'm permanently employed at, knowing full well that the Principal is going to try and make my life hell. Why would anyone believe me? I'm 57, overweight and balding . He is 40 dresses like a rockstar and lies without blinking. If it wasn't for my four kids I know which route I would choose to take as I'm pretty sure no one would miss me, and more and more I feel like it might be a good option.

This is only a very brief outline of the life I have created for myself. I was bought up to respect others, not to be violent to women, not to tell lies or judge others harshly when you don't know a person's story and I believe in a god and Jesus. I refuse to hurt anyone and will always give assistance when asked. As a Replacement Teacher I have been told I'm excellent. As a parent I have been told that I am very good sand loved by my children. My parents say that I am a good and loving child (when they are not medicated). I have helped my sister with so many emmotional issues I have lost count. (Her marriage broke up 15 years ago). I know that I'm a good person and have let myself become a victim. My self esteem is now so low that any counselling or psychological guidance is pointless. I had to get this off my chest and this seemed like a pretty good place to do it. Even if nobody reads it now, there will a record of why I might do something that I currently would not do. Maybe it's just a monthly low point. To all intents and purposes Psychiatrists and Psychologists say I'm sane because I'm depressed about my situation, but hearing the same old dross is wearing me out. I think I need a lawyer as well as a psychiatrist because I know that I have had a bad run. if any body has bothered to read this, sorry about the whinge. Hopefully I'll make it through the next month.

Cheers and god love you to all

Leroy58