JezzaCasual Contributor
Sibling struggling
My brother, who is in his late 40's, has suffered from mental illness for many years. He has hidden a lot of his life from his family, but recently revealed that he was abused as a child...and that many of his struggles later in life result from this abuse. Addictions, bulimia, depression, anxiety......He has seen various psychologist and psychiatrists over the years. Recently, a new psych seemed to be making a difference in his life-helping him talk about his past abuse. We felt like it was a breakthrough of sorts. However, he has now withdrawn even further. Whilst he lives independently, if it wasn't for my parents, this would not be possible. They asssist with his business, clean his house, try to assist with getting him to appointments....Listing what they do almost trivialises the amount of time and effort they devote to him. They are now elderly and I can see the strain it puts on their marriage and their health. My father in particular would love to travel, but feels that he is being selfish for wanting a break. In addition to worrying about my brother, I worry equally about my parents. Whilst I know my brother appreciates what they do, he gets angry at them and tells them they aren't supportive if they gently push him to attend appointments. I don't believe that the expensive psych visits are helping him move forward-they seem to be justifying his responses without giving him ways of moving forward. I feel like I need to do something....my parents are too scared to change the cycle for fear of him commiting suicide....and I can't see my brother getting any better or wanting to try anything different. The concoction of drugs that he takes has to have an impact on his mental health....but suggesting that he detoxes would drive a wedge between us. I honestly believe that he needs to go somewhere, away from his current lifestyle, detox and start again. I would love to hear from anyone who has been through a similar experience. I keep hearing that sufferers of mental illness need to talk....that is all that is happening. Talking. Nothing is changing. I am so worried that he will do something to himself, or that one of my parents collapse under the stress......then whoever is left will blame themselves.....Where to from here?
