And now

@utopia@Former-Member and all wonderful people here

Spent last weekend on preparation for the conciliation hearing - utterly horrid to face what has happened and the utterly ridiculous investigation report, could not even get my role title correct - this included the narcissist and the HR cow. Congratulations to me according to this I am of aborignal heritage and reported as being the aboriginal liaison officer, great really - unfortunately she was on the 6 person hit list too. She stood up and then joined the Fit in or F..... Off club. Adept cut and paste by management and highly disriminatory against ATSI peoples as I do not have any familiar heritage whatsover. However the Narcissist has an ATSI heritage,

I went to the conciliation hearing 8/11/2017 and simply broke down - cried and cried. I have finally had to face 5 months of abuse and discrimination because I am unwell - "labeled and stigamatised because I have a MH condition" although I was doing well when all of this started on 12/1/17.

Of course there was a prior "shut her up offer" I did not know about - 6 weeks backpay and unprovable medical expences - I have agreement for a counter - backpay & payment and medical until 31/12/2017. I have been advised to seek legal advice. I am proud that I had enough still going on in my very sooky and anxious head to even request this.Wow now I have finally been diagnosed with BPAD and receiving treatment - I am the worst liability. Clearly mad and dangerous.

I just want to accept the improved offer - and escape finally. No more bullying. no more stigmatisation and no more detrimental treatment just for an income. At least I have become immune in some ways.

I have to also consider that my private practice has kept me going and I believe that it has pretty well kept me here, even though this was the ridiculous judgement from the IME's review. Gotta love being assessed for 40 minutes in June as having no capacity and then determined to be fine to return to that place on full time because I undertake private practice. IDIOT

I always knew I was never going back - I have the best chance now with appropriate treatment. i am assured that the really nasty black hole episodes will improve.

And so - I plan to pretty welll utilise every resource I can - between now and the end of the year.

I simply cannot go through anymore - my anology has always been about reading the last page and closing the book at conciliation. Now it is time to look after me - I will find work to provide income and survive - my practice matters more. I do not mind at all what the work is - any thoughts please

With thanks (Bastless, in loving memory and Odin)

Hi @Bast - well done for getting through it. Sounds like you and me worked for the same organisation - mine couldn't even get the right the person I was making the complaint about. That's atrocious that they incorrectly identified you as ATSI heritage - how on Earth can that happen? Did you go in with a Lawyer? I'm really thankful that I did as it meant all the negotiation was done between lawyers after my delightful former employer had finished saying how much they liked me and how valued I was and could I possibly make such awful accusations against them after all the support they'ds given me. Ha ha - what a joke it is. I imagine you went through the same thing. I likened it to stabbing someone in the back and then offering them a bandaid. OK enough about me - are you happy now that it's over? I'm in the similar situation - we all need income and at the moment I guess we are both still in the recovery mode after the ordeal. I know you can take this experience and use it to help others. You are valued and your practise will thrive. I hope you can close that book now and start on the next episode of your life.

Hi all

I am so sorry to hear about your major medical troubles. I so hope that the knee arthrosopy and the other intrusive investigation are manageable.

I am so fortunate to be medically OK and now doing some physical things rather than being a useless blob. It has taken me so long to move when me and my doona are such best friends. And TB of course. My HB says I yell in my sleep - repeatedly - I yell Stop it, I then display fighting off my attacker by fighting with my arms and fists. He is adamant that he can hear me throughout the house.

I think that the L is helping - although the aftermath of the concilation hearing has created again the "circus" in my mind.; So many days of despair.

And now I am really trying to get off my butt and just be OK regardless of the diagnosis, the fear and the unknown future.

I can still focus upon Odin's development - wow what a Bengal he is now. He leaps up the stairs when he wants to, athletics is now part of his life. I am so pleased that he leaped upon the super screen door and consequently tore it down - now replaced with extra security.

For me I have significant sybolism - I have an incredible plant a Datura that was a gift to me many years ago. I dug it up when we moved and it grew and flowered beautifily - just total adoration. Then during my horror story - I thought it had died, now it has regenerated - with massive amounts of care and tenderness so can I . It has become such a symbol of potential for me.

With many thoughts (in loving memory Bast) and Odin and Baby Girl