I dont know how much longer i can go on like this

@Bunniekinsim terrfied of the upcoming tests and what those results might bring. i dont want to go through with them.

and the physical conditions have been confirmed they will get worse over time and i was in agony the past few days until i finally got my meds back this morning so its settled abit.

oh its jsut everything, i feel like an unworthy person who is burdening everyone. both offline and online. i feel like they are wasting resources on me when i cant be fixed. im a broken rag doll getting thrown around to be fixed but keep constantly breaking anyway

@outlander I think you are very brave being through everything that you have. I cannot imagine going through it all myself so above all be very proud of yourself, and be kind to yourself if you are feeling more than a bit jittery with the upcoming tests.

I bet you don't want to go for the tests ...I wouldn't blame you ... I think the way you will have to look at them is to put each test into a seperate box, open each one up as you go and close the lid once they are done. Don't look at them all together because that is too much to process.

You are definately a worthy person who is NOT a burden on anyone. You are a pleasure to talk to and I enjoy talking with you every day, You are a very tough young woman, just take the day one test at a time .... it will be okay.

@Sans911@outlander Yes I think this period of our lives is called 'character building' or so they say ...

@outlander You?? upset someone?? It is always me who puts her big foot in her mouth? I think it's a Bipolar thing I really cannot help it when my mind is racing .. Who have you upset?

@Sans911 Thanks Sans911 that's really nice to be told. One can never be told enough can they. I think everyone online I have met has been kind and compassionate. I have not met a negative person at all which is really nice. It has a great atmosphere on the forums.