I dont know how much longer i can go on like this

---

@outlander wrote:

my psych said she cant help me, only i can help msyelf. what faith do i now have in the mh system? for someone who cant help themselves to be told that not even a mh professional cant help.

---

@outlander I always find it utterly absurd when psychologists say "only you can help yourself." I have had numerous psychologists say that to me over the years. My response has always been "then what the f*ck am I paying you for?" Thus far no psychologist has been able to come up with an answer to that one.

I think it is one of those idiotic fluffy lines that, when you unpack it, has no substance to it. I mean really, if a psychologist truly believed that they couldn't help anyone and that the person can only ever help themselves, then what does the psychologist possibly think they are getting paid to do???

People can learn skills to help them regulate and cope with big feelings better. People can heal from trauma related issues in the context of a super safe therapeutic relationship. People can learn assertiveness skills so that they can better get their needs met in their environment. These things are doable...if only you can find a therapist skilled enough to do it.

From what I can tell, when a psychologist does the "only you can help yourself" thing, what they are actually saying is "I don't know how to help you." That doesn't mean you are unhelpable, it just means that that particular psychologist lacks the skill to help you.

Take it easy @outlander 💗💗💗

you are to me sis @outlander 💕💕💕

Good Morning Claire @outlander

You are right, I'm not entirely ok . . . I never am - but I'm alright; if that makes sense. I often feel like I'm lying to you when I say 'things will get better', in some cases I don't think it ever does - but it changes, everything changes. The longer you survive the more chance you have of tailoring your life experiences to your own preferences. I choose loneliness, I choose a flat-line life - it's the best of a bad bunch for me. I'm not real big on the forgiving and forgetting . . . and that includes me. I prefer to look at it as learning. I have never had a successful relationship of any kind, I could blame everyone else, but the only constant factor in all that . . . . is me. We, this planet and all it's life forms, are just a speck of stardust in the Universe - it is often how I proportionalize my own problems . . . they are nothing.

I don't know how much longer I can go on like this - but I have learnt that I can survive over half a century, I have learnt that I meant it when I said 'I will not give up'

Never give up Claire Everything changes 🙂