Night Shift

sleep well @Angels333 xx

sending you hugs @Former-Member, hope you have a nice sleep , take care my friend xx

Hi @comet

I'm not sure how to start this so I guess diving in is the best way. I did try today to find a different way to communicate this with you other than on the forum so that we both kept some level of dignity but it wasn't possible. I'm pretty sure that me and dignity don't ever go in the same sentence (well apart from this sentence😝) so why start now.

I think that you are not alone in the 'over caring'. I think I have been guilty of this too with you. My mind and heart have gone to various places with this over the last month as we found a strong connection. As you would have read in my thread this is a very natural part for me to need to be cared for and to love someone again but my wise mind keeps telling me that I can't have anything more than a caring friendship with anyone until I am in control of me. This doesn't stop loneliness or desire for intimacy for me though.

You have never caused me hurt or distress to the level you think. I have been unravelling and becoming more unstable all by myself. You leaving the forum won't change this one bit. Last week was the most undone I had come all year and there was so much I didn't disclose on the forum that was only to do with my 'in real life' relationships. I acknowledge that we have both hurt each other on here but I have always known where your heart was. I have never seen any sign of intention to hurt by you. I can honestly tell you I have been more hurt on this forum by others than by you and I have managed to deal with that ok.

So where to now. I really don't won't you to leave the forum if you are worried that you will hurt me. This is not a reason to leave. I am slowly learning how to put on my big girl pants on again to deal with things. I do however respect your wishes to have a break if you need it for you. The most important person you need to look after is you. I had made the decision last night to change the way I interact on this forum too. I am going to try to set limits and just come on for a while after tea each night if I am ok. I was also attached to my phone. The forum has helped heaps but now I have to find limits to so I can start to live in the really real more too. I think I need both.

I hope this helps and not hinders. I will always care for you too and want the best for you what ever that is. Sending hugs and best wishes for what ever you decide😊💜

Hi @Faith-and-Hope

I do find it comforting to stay online and just go through threads and re read posts and look for threads that mite be helpful.

I had gym session tonight, and I was able to get a good amount done there, and I feel better for going. It mite help me sleep better tonight. I have been taking magnesium, and I do find I get some benefit from this. I was thinking of changing over to the powder for some people it works better then the tablet.

Hi @Faith-and-Hope,

I also loved the heart you posted earlier. How has your day been? I'm hoping better than yesterday.

Hi @Mazarita.

Thanks for letting us know you are okay. I hope you are accomplishing activities and creative projects during your time away. I have decided to try and cut back to just a few hours after tea if I'm ok on the forum for now and see how that goes.

Hi @Former-Member

good luck for tomorrow and I hope you enjoy your coffee.

Hi @Former-Member, @Shaz51, @BlueBay, @Former-Member I hope you are all having a relaxing night.

thinking of you @Angels333 I hope tomorrow is more gentle for you.

sending hugs to all and best wishes😊💜

Hi @PeppiPatty,

i missed one of your posts last night about excess empathy. Thanks for writing that. And I totally agree with how @Silenus can inspire us, not just for writing but for his outlook on life too. I hope today is treating you well. 😊💜

hi @Decadian,

i think you've been quiet today. I hope you are ok. I can't remember when you go away too. Thinking of you😊💜

@Teej thanks for connecting and I hope you are having a good nite too.

@Angels333 hope you are okay and have a better day tomorrow. Hope your Dr as gotten back to you. Be kind to yourself.

Welcome to all the new contributors, and I hope find the forum supportive and worthwhile for you.

@Former-Member I saw your other post re day programs as well but I'm afraid I haven't had that experience yet. I'm hoping to start a similar program at the community health centre soon so I guess I'll find out then what it will be like. I do think it's really important to be able to connect with anyone who manages our mental health for us to be able to move forward. Anytime I can't connect my mental health gets worse. Not sure if this helps. Take care😊💜

@comet I should be around tomorrow although I am supposed to being going away for a night with my friend, her son and my son but I've been unwell with a virus so I'm not sure if I'll go yet. I've been coughing all night for the last few and I don't want to keep everyone awake. I'll have internet though regardless. You cracked me up about the name, comet is fine. Take care😊💜

@Teej

I just can't see myself feeling comfortable with her and that is why I withdraw because I don't feel safe. But also because the day program is Art Therapy I don't have much talent or ability in this area thus my anxiety tends to be high too.

I'm trying to think my way through this and I thought going to group would be helpful for me and to be around other people with MI and to get some support. I know most of the groups I have been with its been the other patients that have made the program and not nesscary the person running the group.

I'm not sure how to bring this up with my psychiatrist and if she really would care anyway.

You are right if you don't feel safe or if their is a lack of trust, I also find like yourself that your mental health becomes worse that is probably what I was trying to say. I mite go this coming Thursday and see how I go and take it from there. I think that will be my plan..