Night Shift

Thanks all for your good vibes on my longer sleep last night.

Hi @Decadian, I was asleep again when you sent that message hours after I'd been logged on so you were right anyway by chance. Yes, though I got a longer night's sleep, weekends I usually need more of it anyway to recover from week's outings and efforts to go above and beyond my natural inclination to do... nothing. Been that way with the nothingness impulse pretty much since I was a kid, but I know that the effort to do things pays off in improved wellbeing so I keep at it. Have to do a bit of nothingness in between though. Physical ailments seem to demand it too.

Hi @Former-Member, how are you today? Always great to see your face, so to speak.

Hi @eth, I'm guessing you will be in your appointment as I write this. Hope it's going well. Totally understand how there is a lack of impulse to engage when feeling down. Great to hear from you when you do check in. I'm hoping you won't mind if we keep prompting you to say gidday when you can though. What are friends for but to help you engage even when you don't feel like it.

Hi @comet, I too wondered if it might be something to do with the session yesterday that helped me sleep. We talked about an issue I haven't mentioned on the forum that troubles me a lot, and we seemed to get to the bottom of it in some ways, relating to early life experiences and compounded throughout my adult life. There are now some helpful strategies in place on how to keep challenging this deeply ingrained way of thinking so that it becomes less powerful in the deeper parts of my mind.

Hi to anyone else around too. Hope your day is going well. If not, hugs.

@comet,

Good to hear someone else who gets it about the nothing impulse. Probably is related to bipolar. Then when we get going we can't stop because otherwise we fear we'll fall back into the nothingness, which is actually what happens when it's at it's worst. Bit of a vicious cycle, eh? I'm glad for the meds to help the brain chemistry that goes with that. It's also why I like to take things in a slow, building up kind of pace these days, so that I'm not rocked too much off my boat from day to day, week to week, like I used to be.

Yes, was wearing the compression socks when I went out yesterday and the shoe inserts. The inserts will take a bit of getting used to so the podiatrist said to take it gradually with the walking. Walked a bit a few days this week, mainly to and from bus stops and the shops. Today my legs are feeling much better than they have for a while so something seems to be helping, at least for now. Thanks for asking!

Are you up to anything today? How's the weather where you are? How are you feeling?

@comet, sounds like you are north of where I am in south east queensland. Sunny day today but not so warm by our standards. I'm still in my dressing gown. About to finally get dressed. I wonder if I might even make it to the beach today for a bit of a test walk. We'll see... Hope the afternoon treats you really well too!

Hi @Mazarita

Health problems always make things harder - and I guess it doesn't what part of ourselves is affected - it makes things harder -

I didn't get my shopping - I think I might get some fish and chips today - I keep looking at the BOM radar and there is rain on the other side of the bay - so walking all the way to the supermarket is over-ambitions - I am not maso chistic

I spent ages looking at accommodation and made up my mind - I ran right the Centre on Monday and book that - it's exciting doing all this - but I am not out of the house yet

Dcadian

Oh @comet I used to do 6 coffees in a row. Now I am up to no 2 and hope thats enough.

@Mazarita Glad sleep, and your orthotics are having an effect. You have a lot falling into place in your life now.

I have a been the opposite and mostly very active ... tilI I crash .. and get up again .. but pretty driven ... though I did meditation from my 20s. I really needed it to balance the other.

@eth Good to see you around the forums. Hope your appointment goes well.

I have started with a new/old psychologist. I was referred thru NSW Dept of Justice. They are covering ongoing sessions. Looked on her website .. her glam shot didnt look familiar but her profile did. As she has a lot of the specialities I am interested in ... narrative therapy ACT etc ..I was optimistic. So on Thursday I trundled into town. I recognised her in person. She still had my old file .. it had been 9 years since I saw her. It was only one session. She stopped coming out to my end of town. I had big replay of abandonment issues ... but she left because she couldnt hear clients as the surgery was very noisy .. so at least she wanted to do her job properly ...

@plasmo I was very out of the loop before I joined this forum. it helps a lot to find out what is available and gradually you might set up supports that suit you. Apparently there is a big autism conference in Melbourne that Amaze is running. Maybe Amaze is worth checking out...

I am feeling a lot more secure since starting a year ago. Linking into services .. or the services are finally coming of age and recognising my issues.

@Decadian, great that you have the booking in place, something to look forward to now. When I have planned trips down south in recent years I have often not been in a good place at the time and wondered how I was going to get myself to another city when I couldn't even get myself to the shops. The main thing that got me there was just focussing on the the main things that needed to be done, giving myself plenty of time to do them. Like doing the washing sometime during the week leading up to it. Packing the day before. Then I just have to get myself to the airport. I'll ring a taxi if I don't have a lift. Once at the airport everything tends to roll on with its own momentum. Hope it all works smoothly for you too.

@comet, ah, lovely part of the world you live in. I've often fantasised about living there and may well end up there in time. Cheers for the good wishes.

@Appleblossom, our posts went through at the same time. So I thought I'd just edit this one to respond. I have been very driven at times too but there always seems to be this strong gravitational downwards pull to nothingness. Mind you, I have had crohns disease since I was 18 and that has effected my physical capacity to be driven, even when I was inclined that way at times. I too have practiced meditation techniques for a long time, though in an informal kind of way and mainly interested in breathing techniques. I've found mantric chanting helpful too at times. Good to hear you have started with subsidised ongoing therapy now. Not sure if you meant the therapist left today because of the a noisy surgery. That must have been a bit weird if you were going through your abandonment issues! Great that you are feeling more supported than you did when you first arrived on the forum. So do I, much more supported.

@PeppiPatty, adding my voice to that of @Appleblossom's in giving you a callout to see how you are travelling. I hope you are checking your spam folder in an ongoing way now to see these messages. I don't have an easy answer as to why your emails are doing that. It might help if I knew what service you are using. Is it Gmail by any chance? In any case, sending hugs and good wishes to you, friend.