Night Shift

Me too @plasmo and I learned to catch myself .. at least you care to try and learn .. many out there dont bother.

Yes @Faith-and-Hope I am learning to let the ocker in me out .. with humour .. one foster father was more ocker (than my biological) and in my church choir ... he surprised me by "speaking" through me .. I felt so embarrassed as I didnt do ocker there ..

But it I have had to walk a line in some spheres (including with my mother) where it was frowned upon .. she told me off for having an Australian accent in the last year of her life ... but she gave birth to me in this country .. she was not good at ownership and projected a lot.

so I turned myself into a pretzel being a chameleon

@Appleblossom yeah i'm a lot better socially these days

We just need a range of responses and to get better at reading others.

It isnt a one size fits all ... and if we are honest .. is something we hone til the day we check out.

I had a conversation today with a man who had a great 3 hour social conversation with a friend thought he was doing great .. but he then suicided .. life is full of curved balls

@Appleblossom

That new thread @MoonGal has started has got something to it .... according to some schools of thought in psychology we have something called sub personalities ..... have you come across it in your reading ?

These are like threads to our overall personality, and are usually given names according to what they represent (eg inner child) or how they behave (harsh critic).

I find it fascinating because you can start to recognise aspects of your own character, and where the strengths and weakness lie in that aspect.

I can relate to this "turning into a pretzel trying to be a chameleon" ....... I have a "people-pleaser" sub personality .....

The strength in that is to be of service to other people, build community spirit, build bridges between parties in conflict, bring out the best in others, support others in need.

The weakness in that is turning into a pretzel trying to be a chameleon .....

Understanding the strengths and weaknesses of each contributes to the betterment of your overall mental health, in that you can harness and direct the strengths, and learn from and redirect your weaknesses.

@plasmoand sometimes people are intentionally shielding their real state ... wearing masks ... etc .. that man I spoke to today .. figured his friend had made the decision .. but was indulging him as he unexpectedly visited

wearing masks can be useful for professionalism and parenting or can be false .. another situation depends on context

@Faith-and-Hope I came across a lot in my 20s ... I posted on that thread though as i think it is important ...its just that sometimes the early stresses are so heavy and complex

.. it takes longer than usual to integrate ... and then some people can be impatient and not want to hear a story why certain milestones arent reached pronto.

@Appleblossom sounds about right.. time for me to sleep

Nite

@Appleblossom

Yes, these things take time and patience, for sure.

I'm dozing off now too @Appleblossom

G'night

💜