Night Shift

Hi @plasmo and @eth, DSP here too. Can't see myself being in the regular workforce again. 53 years old and I've had roughly 50 jobs in my life. Almost all of them sent me to breakdowns from the combination of bipolar, crohns disease and other illness throughout my life. I've been close to homeless a couple of times before the DSP was approved. Would hate to go back to the constant crisis state I was in for most of my life. My best contribution to the world is through creativity I think. I'm prolific with that.

I echo much of what you just said @Mazarita, but I don't have the creative expression in the world that you do. The writing bug didn't really kick in again yet like I was hoping it would, but that's not to say it won't in the future. I'm interested in peer support work but a) the training is not available up here and I'm not up to doing an online Cert IV and b) I've burned out with compassion fatigue in my past line of work as a massage therapist and disability carer. So I'm in a holding pattern for the time being with no real goals other than managing my health and maintaining my home.

@eth, I hear you about feeling a lack of goals and sense of purpose. I don't have any concrete goals with things either. The creativity is mainly on the net these days, which makes it managable with the mental/physical health issues, and I have no ambition to make money from it any more. But it is enough to give me a sense of meaning and cultural contribution. I think the way you support people here is a kind of voluntary work you do.

It's a bit like that for me too @plasmo. I was mostly self-employed and didn't get references and all my qualifications are well and truly out of date. I tried going back to study in 2012 to renew my massage therapy diploma but it didn't work out for a couple of reasons. Then I realised I wouldn't have been up to the reality of practising again anyway.

@plasmo, do you mind if I ask roughly how old you are?

Thankyou for saying that @Mazarita. I have been thinking that recently too. It's a step in that direction anyway. When I did work I always did some of my work at a greatly reduced price for those who wouldn't have been able to have it otherwise and also did voluntary placements in a youth drug and alcohol centre and a women's half-way house for women coming out of prison.

But I have to say that being here is definitely a two-way street. I am helped and supported too and it means a lot to me.

@eth, those are demanding caring roles you have taken on in your life and all the more admirable in my view when done for little or no payment. You have also cared for and raised children, another area of unpaid work that is not properly recognised. The endless race for the almighty dollar is a problem in our society I think. Perhaps there are other, even new areas of interest that might be rewarding for you and others in time. Meantime I think trying to manage your mental health is a valid priority.

Funny I had started to think about getting more work this week. One lady asked me which school I was in, and I would like i or 2 sessions per week in a local school, but I cant afford (physically) to deal with any discipline problems. I feel I have something to offer and it would be good for my mental health to work part-time. I cant see myself ever going full time again.

I looked online a while ago to try to get referred to a disability network and nothing was working and I got the run around so I let it go. My son has been taking a lot of my attention and energy, but it might be time to try again. I am not interested in sending out CVs until I know I have a promise of support for my neck. I would want to look at the physical layout of the place too.

I think I really needed to immerse myself in this site for the year, though. It helped me put my position in perspective and update myself about current issues. Also helped me get through low times when I was feeling very isolated.

Tomorrow I have appointment with psychologist. She is the same one whom I saw with Carers last year, but I focussed on son's needs and relationship. Now I have 10 sessions with her under a program for Forgotten Australians. The funding is for me and my issues, so I will address these things with her and also do a bit of an integrity check list of me dealing with all my oodles of past baggage to assess my mental and emotional health. .. not bloody mood tools.

@plasmo its great that you are feeling confident to take on more. @eth is wise in saying take it slowly. Better be good for the long term than crash and burn.

Hi @Mazarita I think your attitude is good and it sits well on you. Keep dignity with it. I am sure your footprint is light on this earth. Did you hear about the Break free protest at Newcastle. I played with the idea of going as I was more than half way there on my music weekend .. but thought it wiser not to. But a 94 year old was there .... Yay