Night Shift

Hi @eth and @Mazarita as you know now I have emailed you both this morning regarding your previous posts, which have now been approved. Apologies again for the confusion 🙂

Thanks for your comments @Faith-and-Hope

That terrible time is many years in the past but I still have moments - flashbacks and PTSD - but I have used everything possible to rise above it. However it never goes away completely

But it's having had all of this happen that brought me here and I have found so many wonderful people who understand and who are going through what I did - what I still do to a lesser extent - and it is something pretty special to be in a place that I can help other people when I am also helping myself

I feel for your daughter - I think I pretty well know the despair you are feeling - I would look at my son at times and I could sometimes see the future - not that I needed to be psychic or anything - my son did not fit into society and was into so much trouble

So - I know now there is more around to help troubled young people - how I wish this had been around when my son was a younger boy - he might have found help - but there wasn't much around at the time.

But whatever is going on with your daughter - she is the only one who can get out of that - if it helps to get her to go to Head Space or something like that - or Beyond Blue - I don't know how these things work but if young people can find a place where they can open up and do open up then it might help.

But when someone is rolled up in a psycholgical misery and having physical pain too - it would be easier to blame the physical pain because that is something people can see that - maybe identify with it - but this is confusing - and you know this.

It is incredibly difficult to know - to comment. I don't know what is bothering her - but it must be terribly hard for you. You must feel out of your depth - I really pray you can find some help for her

Decadian

oh @eth I must find your last dream....

How is everyone this morning?

It;s good to see you all getting along so well.....Is @Faith-and-Hope a Mum? Please bear with me while I get my memories back.....

How are you @Mazarita and @Decadian ?

Hi @PeppiPatty good to see you again. How is your day today?

Hi @PeppiPatty, how is your day going? I'm much better overall than I was a few months ago and hugely better than when we first met almost a year ago on the forum. But today I am having mostly a rest day and just spending time here on the forum and doing a few things around the flat. May start early work on another video before too long and go for a walk later. Maybe not. I've given myself permission to just go with the flow for today.

Hi @Decadian @eth @Mazarita

Here's how it's going:

Daughter to school ✅

and on time for her test ✅

Walk to the river with a friend ✅

Sighted dolphins - not today 😏

Coffee ❗️✅

Walk back from the river ✅

Daughter 1 has a melt-down at me over our situation 😓

Daughter 3 Cc's me emails from school showing she's picking up her commitments ❗️✅✅✅

Son 2 went to class yesterday, driving lesson today ✅✅

Daughter 2 has been helping around the house ✅

Son 1 phoned last night, supportive of our situation ✅

Most of it is going well ...

Thanks @Angels333

It's sort of been like that for my husband growing up, only it wasn't drug use.

His parents were a bit lost emotionally. His father was so emotionally absent that he provided for the family financially, but wasn't actually parenting at all. He was off living his own life to the side, totally self-absorbed.

His mother became emotionally dependent on her children, so effectively they have had to parent her, and my husband was the natural leader amongst his siblings, so he became like the head of his family while he was still a child really ...

Having had no role-model, my husband has been learning how to be a father "on the job", and I am very proud of him for that overall. His heart has always been in the right place.

The trouble now is that his eating disorder is affecting his emotional stability, and making him self-absorbed like his father. I didn't understand the MI side of eating disorders before coming into this experience, and the ED is so well hidden, it has seemed to take forever to get through to anyone that our ship has been sinking over here.

I have just kept baling like mad, waving flags and blowing whistles wherever I could, and trying to keep everyone else afloat until the truth surfaced, which it is starting to do now, Help is arriving by degrees, but it's still not easy, and we have quite a way to go yet.

Just gotta keep going ...

You guys are helping me more than you know. Thank you so, so much ! 💌 ... ❤️❤️❤️

@Faith-and-Hope you are so strong the way you persist and maintain your positivity in the face of all you deal with on a daily basis. So glad help is starting to come your way, albeit slowly. Sorry to hear about daughter 1's meltdown.

There will be melt-downs along the way @eth. It's par for the course with something like this.

Daughter 1 is getting married soon, and this should be a really joyful time for her. Instead all if our relationships have gone out of whack, her younger siblings are struggling and not shouldering commitments properly. We have an 18th and 21st family events to get through ahead of the wedding, and husband is in blissful denial of the trail of destruction he is creating.

Because he is in denial and we can't get treatment for him until someone or something breaks through that, or he has a health break-down, we are playing this awful game of make-believe that "everything is okay at our house Jack" while we are trying to keep it all together.

We can only take it one step at a time, dealing with all the associated issues along the way.

That's where Daughter 3 is starting to cross physical health issues that are normally manageable and treatable into a psychosomatic disorder, and I can see signs of depression in Son 2, but at least now the GP is onto it.

🐠🐠🐠 Swimming on ...