Taking the plunge

@Former-Member I see you behind the support button. Is today NBN fixit for you?

Sending 💙💙💙💙💙💙☕️☕️☕️☕️☕️☕️☕️

Morning @Maggie @CheerBear 😀

Re NBN .. according to outages msg .. should be back on by next Monday. 😡

Sherry

Oh gosh @Former-Member 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬 That really isn’t acceptable. How do they get away with this.?????

@CheerBear Nothing is straight forward in life. Even with a little good sprinkles, history sprinkles back. “ I told you so” stuff and “control” are huge in my life. Alway feeling responsible for all the bad stuff.

I honestly thought I was done with the faith ish @CheerBear but I have a itch. Nothing spiritual about an itch is there. Complicated, tricky, jumbled..yes indeed.

I had some delicious apricots from counsellors tree on Friday. I heard the tales of grabbing some before the birds ate them all. She lost all her cherries while on holiday. Some happy birds out there. Purple hanging basket sounds nice. I press my pansies and make cards. I actually press anything that’s pressable. 😁😁😁😁

I love the way you write and the way you see things @Maggie (I'm not sure if I said this exact thing yesterday but I'll say it again anyway!). "Even with a little good sprinkles, history sprinkles back". So true. There are layers and layers under everything. Very little is as it seems on the surface. I appreciate how much you get that.

Noticing that itch and paying attention to what it is telling you in a cautious but hopeful way - no wonder it's hard. Big ❤

I drooled a little at cherries. They're often too expensive for us here and a real treat when we get them. Mangoes are another. I'd happily live off them! We had sooooo many apricots again this year. Bags full for neighbours and family, along with ample for the birds that get first dibs 😆

Smiles at pressing anything. If resin wasn't so pricey you could do some awesome coasters with floating flowers. Well person plays with resin sometimes. They made me an incredible table out of a tree stump and poured resin on the top, for our crafty KK. Theyve put flecks of blue and silver in parts of the resin. I love it!

I'm off to their house today (house 2) to pick up the crew. Unwell person gets results tomorrow from big tests. I'm not going to the appointment this time and trying not to feel guilty about it. I almost broke myself putting their needs first above all others. When the tables were turned they weren't there for me. For the couple of weeks I was away they were not there, saying afterwards that the best thing for me when I was like that was to leave me alone. I felt sad. I'm trying not to feel like I am being spiteful in not going tomorrow and seeing it more as you're seeing the relationship with kind of friend. Only useful when I'm useful and needing to look out for myself a bit more. Just another complicated and tricky thing I guess.

Edit - yay forum filters jumbling posts :face_with_rolling_eyes:

@CheerBear You are a wise, intelligent and extremely caring person. That resonates through the screen. Your decision to not go to the appointment tomorrow is nothing to do with being spiteful at all. When the tables are turned, and you are left alone, speaks volumes, listen to your heart. 💜💜💜

I have spent years bending over backwards for kind of friend also, but i’m alone in my own needs. It won’t be easy to withdraw, but protection is wise. It’s self care/survival stuff I think. We get given twisted messages throughout life. Untwisting gets complicated, and some won’t like it. Manipulate loses some control.

I won’t be brain washed again @CheerBear . So super tricky with the itch stuff. I will have to make sense of it. I sense I might be difficult/different , I need to know they are up to it/me. I need to be met now, if not, I will walk.....possibly run. 😁😁😁

Spent a couple of hours at my sister's this morning @Maggie I am extremely tired today and that must have shown as my sister did not want me to do anymore. She was heading out to get lunch anyway so I finished cleaning the windows, helped her make the bed and then came home.

I started sorting out the books on one of the bookshelves and ones I had boxed up last night so will continue that today - but no rush and can do it bit by bit. Some I can't do until I get the boxes tonight and can move a few things in front of my other bookcases. Have the last load of washing on as well today so all the blankets and baby doonas I put on Toby's bed will be freshly washed (yes you red that correctly ...baby doonas ) His bed in the loungeroom is a cot matress with a pillow nd baby doona on it. He has had it since he was a puppy and actually lays his head on the pillow He doesn't use it as much as he used to preferring to be on the couch next to me

Thank you for your kind words re: work. It has been a long, hard road to get back to where I am now but I am doing it - and that is still pretty amazing to me. I am going to go into the new school either later this week or Tuesday next week - I want my house to be done first so I can concentrate just on work after that so it is most likely to be Tuesday.

Hope you are having a good day too Maggie - much love coming your way from me, Cat and Tobes

@CheerBear I completely hear your disappointment with regards to well and unwell one and the real sense of being let down when you needed that support the most. You have given your time, energy and support to them and it has not been returned to you in anyway. You have every right to feel as you do but it hurts even though you know you cannot rely on them when things are tough for you. This new relationship you are building with your friend is more important to you than supporting unwell one with getting test results ...they have made their bed by not supporting you and now they can lay in it alone. Your happiness is super important CB so grab anytime you can with friend as he seems to make you really happy ...and that is certainly something to hold onto.