cruising on the surface but beneath the surface ???

@Surfa2 Hi I am new to the boards too. I'm a mum of boys (now grown up men). One of whom has had ongoing depression (it runs in our genes I am afraid).

The right medication is vital I think ... finding quiet time for yourself as well, away from the pumped up atmosphere of the gym might be a good idea too.

Business owner with 3 small kids and your wife in recovery ... you have your hands full ... can you delegate some of the easier responsibilities? Giving you more time for yourself. You call yourself Surfa ... do you surf? That would be a perfect way to de stress ... you know what I think (and I am an old woman so I can say it as I think it) much better than the gym.

Take care

Green Pea

Hi @Surfa2 and @Bunniekins and welcome to both of you to the forum

@Surfa2 I think you are struggling with what many people here do - on the outside we wear a mask to cover what is truly going on underneath. In most instances it is our coping strategy to get through each day and not 'show' our feelings as that would then bring with it unwanted attention (does that sound familiar?) This is not a sign of being 'weak' or being a coward - infsct the opposite - you are protecting those around you from knowing how much you are hurting underneath. Although this isn't always ideal it does show your compassion and underlying strength.

The great thing about this forum is that you csn talk openly (or not) about your feelings without any judgement and with people that have travelled similar roads as you and continue to navigate the potholes! We also understand the struggles that come with mental illness and trauma and the process of becoming 'well' is often complicated, long and ever evolving.

I am so pleased you have found us here and I hope that you are able to continue to 'talk', seek advice and/or share your personal experiences.

Again - welcome to the forum @Surfa2 and @Bunniekins if you have any questions or need any direction on finding your way around - just ask.

Zoe

Welcome to the forum 😄

I hope you find this place a bit of stress relief for you. you sound like your doing an amazing job. When was the last time you went on a holiday?

Hi @Surfa2

Welcome to the forums, it is great that you have posted here and shared so much. Thank you! I hope that here you will find some understanding and care from others who know what it is like to juggle mh/depression and anxiety with the added stress.

Sounds like you have so much going on right now. I have seen and heard of how hard it can be running a business, and the pressure must be so high. I don't have any experience of running a business though i can relate to feeling stressed from work. I also tend to be a perfectionist and add to my load unnecessarily at times. I don't think you are 'weak' or a 'coward' for feeling stressed from work, i think its probably very justified iwth all that you have on! And i dont know that i've met many/any business owners who weren't stressed by their jobs.

Its great that you have the gym as one outlet for yourself!

I also have children (both in primary school) but am a single mama. Your wifes struggles sound difficult as well after having a car accident! Is she recovering?

I hope that it does help to be here on the forums, sometimes just sharing the load and being heard helps!

Hi @Surfa2, thanks for sharing so much about yourself with us.

@Ant7, I wonder if you can relate to this discussion and might have something to share? It seems to me like you two might have things in common...

How are you feeling today @Surfa2?

I think that a lot of us can relate to being highly sensitive, being a perfectionist and having a fear of failure. I wonder what would happen if we did actually fail at something? Would it be as bad as you think?