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oh wow - 5 hrs is awesome @utopia woohoo

Wtg @utopia ..... great honest communication. Love that your psych is hearing you .....

Well done @utopia

I guess non-smokers don't know how needing a cigaretter can blow all other ideas out of our mind - and colouring in or puzzles don't do the job

Even I know this - this is not the time to be piddling with smokes - or calmers for that matter

I bet you have the feeling that all of this is a waste of time - and crying without tissues - oh what else can they do to you

But you have been heard - that's good - it worked - being assertive about it worked

That's great

Dec

Good news, @utopia. You don't need the extra stress. Hope things start to feel better after jumping those painful obstacles.

Just glad to hear our resident cocky is alive and squawking.

Lots of love @utopia

So many stupid comments I heard yesterday by 'professional' staff. My psych asked how my new mood stabaliser was and did I think it was working. I said other than a dry mouth, constant thirst and constant weeing - everything is the same. He said what about your mood - has your suicidal thoughts diminished? . I said no. Suicidal thoughts are still present 24/7.

And then he says, "so do you think these new meds are working? ??? SERIOUSLY !!!!

I just replied with ' you're the quack, you tell me if they are working'.

Am I stupid here? Did I miss something, or was he being thick as a brick asking such a stupid question when I said the thoughts were still there?

Thick as a brick seems to be appropriate here @utopia

He certainly doesn't seem to have listened to anything you said - so frustrating

The GP I had to see here last night decided that I definitely need some medication due to my high blood pressure, but she says, she won't be giving me blood pressure tablets, no, these other tablets she will give me will just lower my blood pressure but they are not blood pressure tablets. Lol.

Drives me mad in here.

At about 7.10pm I asked for leave til 8pm (when smoking finishes fot everyone). Was feeling pretty chuffed I could ask for such a long time. Anker said he will write my pass. But at the same time a student nurse wanted to di my obs. So she takes my bp and then takes it again because she must have made a mistake she thinks. Nope 191/? She goes to write it in my chart. Anker hands me my pass and I head downstairs to go for my long smoko. I show my pass to reception and she says "I just got a phone call you need to go straight back to your unit FARK!

I get up to the nurses room, bang on the door, didn't care who opened it & I yelled "this better not be about my f***ing bp".

Anker yells back. "Of course it's about your bp".

Because it was tooo high - he had to take it. Aaarrrggghhh!!!

But he knew how to do it - ask me a question about something else then of course my bp reading was better and I got to go down and have my smokes

Gosh @utopia they sure know how to make your life tough in there. Thinking if you lovely. ❤️❤️❤️

So my battery went flat early last night. But there are certain times you can hand in your phone to be charged in the nurses office or picked up from the nurses office - 4 times a day for 15 minutes only.

So I'm getting tired last night at 9pm so I asked Anker if he could plug in my phone.

"UTOPIA!!!! You know the rules. You have to wait til 10.30pm. I said, I need to go to bed now & I want my ph charged by the morning.

Anker said if I break the rules for you I'll have a flood of people wanting me to do it for them too.

I said "bullshite - I'm the only one that plugs in at the nurses station because I'm the only one who doesn't have leave to go to the f***ing shop and buy one. This is just shite". And I went to bed. I'd turned out my light and was putting in my ear buds (my room mate snores badly) when Anker sticks his head in the door and says, you've got new meds to take tonight. Come on.

I said " not doing it. It's outside of the med dispensing hour so p off".

He finished his shift. I was in my room writing a long letter to my psychiatrist about these rules that don't benefit anyone and that obviously Anker votes for the Liberal Party. Then I went on to write how hard it is to live in this world where Australia sticks up for Israel. Vic Forest cuts down the trees on my mountain killing the last few Greater Gliders (an endangered species).

How the world is all about greed and profit and hate.

So he should give me a reason why I should stick around in a world that doesn't care for people. Who shun and hurt the most vulnerable.

The night nurse gave me an envelope and put it in the front of my file. Now to wait and see what he says.

Anker is not on shift today. Think he might have taken a psych day. Lol