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psychiatrist appt - terrified

psychiatrist appt - terrified

I Have an appointment with my psychiatrist by telemed today. I'm feeling sick about it because i stopped taking one of my medications after court because of how they used it against me to make me sound like a deranged psychopathic liar. I take it to help me sleep but they kept repeating what the use of the tablet is usually prescribed for and now they're saying that if i'm taking that type of medication i can't be stable enough to be a parent. They also kept reading out the psychiatrists report from when i was first in hospital in January and making me say that i was severely mentally ill back then, and perhaps i could be now and either i was lying when i said i wasnt or i wasnt in a fit state to know if i was or not. I'm scared to say anything to the psychiatrist because anything he says or writes will be flipped and skewed by the lawyers for my ex in famlly court. Even if he writes i'm recovering well they'll just say that proves i was 'faking' it in january to put off court. It feels like no matter what i do say its going to be used against me and i just want it all to go away! I'm not doing so well, i know i'm not. But im so scared of telling anyone. our next court hearing is in a weeks time. I thought that a lot of this stuff, these games and stuff would be easier if i got a 'win' in court but its made no difference whatsoever because the 'best' thing for the children is seen as having their 'father' in their lives - until he hurts them. The police and psychologists have all said he will eventually but it doesnt matter to the courts.

Sorry, rant over, has anyone felt like they coudnt talk honestly with their mental health team/person/people?

LJ

108 replies

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In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

@Former-Member Sounds like the medication could be helpful for a bit more sleep. I understand your reluctance though. But if you could get more sleep maybe things might not be so extreme with the overwhelming thoughts. I can only imagine what you are going through, but I think if it was me I would maybe move to a new place around the time the three months are up. Things can be collected from the old place. Perhaps your support workers could help you specifically with finding a new place and sorting out things with the old place? I don't know if that's the kind of support you can get. These are just wild ideas and me keeping you company...

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Thankt you @Mazarita it's just so hard to think straight and yes everyone keeps saying sleep will help it's just I'm so scared and when I fo sleep I know the nightmares will b there. I don't know why this time has sent me into such a bad place. I've been thru worse ... Someone explained it that my bucket is just filled up and it couldn't take any more of anything. But they didn't say how to empty the bucket either.

In response to: Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

@Former-Member I wish I knew what to write that might help you... Maybe you are emptying the bucket a little bit by writing here in the forum... I wonder what other ways you might empty the bucket...

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

🙂 thank you I'm so grateful for the forums.

In response to: Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

I'm going to try to get myself ready for some sleep. I hope you get a better rest tonight...

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Dearest @Former-Member
Hasn't @Maritza been growing into ..... Creative and knowledgeable
Like you Lj ........ You are posting you are being a caring mother showing true love.....

Thinking of you Lj
Anne xx

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Darling @Former-Member
I have so been where you are. Once oh ..... A long time ago seems like yesterday ..... Oh it doesn't matter anymore ...... but honey there should be help from ......
Your GP ?
I'm thinking outside the box here please bear with me ;
Can you call your GP to get Support people on night shift ? I've had that ...... It was a long time ago .......

I'm thinking hard here ......
Can you take a warm shower ? Will that help ?

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Thank you Anne, @PeppiPatty
I don't think they do overnight care etc but they visiting daily during week.
Showers do help sometimes
My little boy has swimming today but I'm not sure if I can do it. I have to go I with him and the thought of it is making me feel sick. Not even sure why really.
Gp I saw yesterday but he wants me to see psychiatrist who I can't get in to see.
Life is a mess...

In response to: Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

We are listening @Former-Member.

I think it takes significant time to empty the bucket when it is overfull. It did take me years and I still struggle... but at the moment my son is chatting to his girlfriend and mucking around on the piano ... all creative and healthy stuff.

Just establish a homebase ... somewhere ... you need a loo, bathroom and kitchen and bedrooms. I know a lady who went off grid .. so technically you dont even need electricity! If your thinking isnt crystal clear weighing up each thing as you can when you are in fine fettle ... too bad ... some decision is better than none.

I would have difficulty choosing meds too and nobody has ever suggested it was my decision .. I guess I am used to med being a professional recommendation that I can discuss and reject or accept ... unless trained medically ... it is hard to make a rational choice.

Sometimes too much attention to feelings magnifies the problems ... that is just a thought ... a lot of women have been through this and come out and survived and their kids have thrived. YOU can do it.

Personally when I was at my worst my psychiatrist didnt push meds. I tried to make my marriage a success without drugs ... I only agreed to take meds after 16 years and CAT team involved for first time and they challenged me about why I stayed in a bad situation. So then I took very logical approach ... one issue at a time ... I also decided to have a tripartite model of health care ... GP ... psychologist ... Physio/osteo for neck.

I left and stayed in cheapo concrete box flat for 18 mths ...

Bottom line .. it is your life ... but this is a tricky time. hugs

In response to: psychiatrist appt - terrified

Re: psychiatrist appt - terrified

So so so much going on,
Appeal from criminal court for ex was heard this week but haven't heard an outcome yet
Family court next week
A new mental health care plan needs to be made apparently
Then see the psychiatrist the following week
Have moved into the refuge properly now I guess but still have to sort out old house and stuff there but finding it hard to be there. Support workers helping though.
My night meds make me cry and feel awful but if I don't take them I'll have to go to hospital and there's nowhere for my kids. Sometimes I feel so trapped by everything I just wish there was an easy escape from it all.
So I'm going day by day and surviving
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