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Something’s not right

-Enigma-

-Enigma-

I have given up now - no one can say it was not without a fight. But then no one on heaven and earth would give a damn anyway. I gave from the heart and it was a joy to help others. I felt such peace with that. I never did it for anything in return ever, I did it because I truly cared and felt so much genuine compassion towards others. I was promised dreams and peace would come true even though I never asked. It felt so good to know I made someone's lives a bit better.

Why is it that people like me are then faced with so much heartache, injustice, trauma and adversity that seeks to do everything in its power to destroy that good, to take the little good and peace I had, to utterly destroy me. Why?

I had always been there when possible others times of need - now that I truly need someone I have been all but abandoned by those I knew and those in the spirit. I realise now everything was a lie and feel utterless helpless and lost. I have lost everything and don't see the point in being here. I hope I don't wake up to another day of despair.

1732 replies

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In response to: -Enigma-

Re: Over The Edge

Hope today is better for you my friend @Former-Member

Love and hugs to send you on your way today...

Zoe

In response to: -Enigma-

Re: Over The Edge

hello @Adge

oh thank you for such a beautiful reply.

you probably don't realise how much your words said.

tears now...most likely a good thing....at least better out than in and I am going to tell myself that they are a good thing

through the tears, I chuckled to myself at not finding "those hearts". I relate so much to that. These lovely photographs that appear here there and everywhere. I would have to spend hours on end trying to find them in the first place and then attempting to add them.

I tried referring a new member to an existing thread and could just not work it out.

others do it so naturally so I then had to ask a moderator.

I spotted someone else new on here and thought I would like to redirect them to introduce yourself. again did not happen. I feel so much for new people joining and that sense of bewilderment, loss, etc etc

I shall look you up on your thread as I know that you are very good for the lovely @Former-Member

In response to: Re: Over The Edge

Re: Over The Edge

@Adge @Faith-and-Hope

Faith posted many hearts. enough for all of us

thank you have followed a few of your posts and read that the times they are a changing

wishing you a safe journey xxxxx

In response to: -Enigma-

Re: Over The Edge

thanks again @Former-Member

am very much in la la land

taking things slowly have not finished unpacking completely; sorted through most of the stuff though.

I had to pay for excess weight no surprise really.

today is my birthday and am just floating in the clouds somewhere so perhaps I am still in the northern hemisphere

am looking to try to get back into walking as well as some volunteer work again eventually

main thing is that I do not want to isolate myself again.

In response to: Re: Over The Edge

Re: Over The Edge

Happy Birthday @Former-Member

In response to: -Enigma-

Re: Over The Edge

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD ONE!!!!!!!!!! @Former-Member have you got anything planned

In response to: Re: Over The Edge

Re: Over The Edge

Happy Birthday Mohill

Best wishes and many Happy returns 😄

Niqua

In response to: Re: Over The Edge

Re: Over The Edge

Hello @Pepsimax

"Have I got anything planned?"

trying to find my head which has been disconnected from my body for toooooo long

We might be going out for a meal tonight locally....new owners... new uplift to pub....hopefully new attitude and good food to go with it.

will catch up with my twin, mum, one son this weekend or at least when jet lag has settled.

what a surprise though @Pepsimax @Former-Member @Zoe7

thank you all does mean a lot even though we say this often.

I do believe that mental illness has so much to answer for in regard to self esteem.

was not expecting anyone to notice..how easy it is to put oneself down out of habit with dreaded mental illness. I am cross with mental illness at moment. might start a new thread!!!

so wishing you all a happy day back ... even if it is just a smile ...love my forum family, missed you when I was away xxxx here come the tears!!!

In response to: Re: Over The Edge

Re: Over The Edge

@Former-Member I totally agree with you in regards to MI having so much to do with self-esteem

The bigger issue here this morning is - would you like a party for your birthday - I'm sure we can whip up something special for you if you would like - I'm thinking a Mad Hatter's Tea Party - what do you think?

In response to: Re: Over The Edge

Re: Over The Edge

Happy Birthday @Former-Member

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