Antidepressants

Hi @oceangirl,

I have spent most of the 20 years of my muddle totally medication free. I tried a whole swag of antidepressants in the early stages and they did nothing for me. About ten years ago, I discovered one that works super well, but only for about three weeks and then the effect wears off, and I refuse to increase the dose because it has the icky side effect of making me super hungry all the time.

A week ago I started on a different anti-depressant and it is thus far having a positive effect. If the effect continues, I will continue to take it.

I am not anti-medication by any means, but I do need to see that it actually has an effect and that it doesn't have any side effects that I don't want to live with.

The reason I have made very little use of medication is that it is well accepted that BPD doesn't respond to medication. This is one of the reasons why for so many years BPD was viewed as untreatable. Thus, I am currently taking an anti-depressant for severe depression, which is additional to the BPD. I have never before been as depressed as I have been over the past few months. Furthermore, I know that if I can connect with a good therapist and get myself into an upward spiral, I will move out of the depression, and then I will stop taking the anti-depressant.

I can't actually remember your particular situation (depression makes my brain puddled!!!!), but that's my experience for what it is worth.

Hi @Phoenix_Rising

Thanks for your input and feedback. I have similar views to yourself. I am very cautious about medication. I will respond in more detail tomorrow, I am not myself tonight. Plus I have specialist appointment tomorrow at 8am, and I am not a morning person. I better go set my alarm.

Hi @oceangirl,

It sounds like you have a similar approach to medication as I do. My aim in taking the antidepressant is that it will help me to do the things that will improve the depression. So, for example, I super want to try and get the research I did for my honours dissertation published, but at the moment my concentration is extremely poor. If the medication can improve my concentration, then working on writing a paper will give me a sense of purpose that in turn will enhance my mood. So, for me, the medication isn't in itself a quick fix, but it will allow me to do the things that will ease the depression.

Similarly, I am back to taking only-in-emergencies medication to help me sleep, after the awful experience with my psychologist on Monday. I don't like taking this medication because I know how highly addictive it is. However, it is allowing me to have a relatively peaceful night's sleep which in turn makes it easier to face the world. This is much better than allowing my brain to be constantly flooded with cortisol (stress hormone). I guess this is perhaps an example of what you mean about taking medication to give yourself a break.

Given the psychiatrist refused to see me, my GP and I are just muddling along together. I think she is actually relieved that I am taking some medication at the moment, but she is 100% respectful of my choices in this area and I deeply appreciate that. I definitely can't cope with arguing with health professionals over this stuff.

What am I doing today?

I think the first thing I need to do is write a list of what I need to do. I have a few things that need to be attended to at home and then I need to head out to the shops. I bought some clothes yesterday and when I got home I realised they hadn't removed one of the security tags. It's one of those ones that will spray dye everywhere if you just try to cut it off. The funny thing is, my bag did beep as I walked out of the shop but they sometimes do that for weird reasons so I didn't think anything of it. No one stopped me and I did a quick dash across the road because the light was green. Grrrrrrrr. It would have been much more time efficient to miss the light and check my bag rather than now having to drive all the way back. Oh well, at least it will force me to get dressed and get out of the house, which I wouldn't do if I didn't have to!

I hope you have a nice day @oceangirl with whatever you are doing.

Hi again @Phoenix_Rising

You have explained that a lot better than me. I am just a bit anxious yesterday and today because I've had to get up early for medical appointments and tests. I think my depression was probably caused by a few factors but I know when my anxiety increases it has a domino affect and my energy levels drop off quite quickly.

I've had that happen myself with security tags too and it always awkard to go back especially when you have not kept the receipt. I've not had that happen in a while-its a bit of pain to go back in, but like you said, its got you moving this morning. I've just had a medical appointment this morning at 8am so I have been up early. I don't have much planned for the rest of the day. I think I am going to try to catch up some sleep and go for a walk this afternoon.

I hope you have a nice day too little turtle 🙂 @Phoenix_Rising Is it sunny where you are today?

Hi @oceangirl,

I have done the first thing on my list - yay! I have another at-home thing to do and then I will head out to the shop. I am extremely glad I kept the receipt! Even so, I was thinking that it is still going to be awkward. I mean, how do they know I didn't buy one and steal one? Oh well, I figure they are just going to have to trust me, given I have the receipt.

It is super sunny here in Western Sydney today. I'm thinking that I will take a walk after I go to the shop too. Walks definitely help to clear puddled brains, don't they! I hope you enjoy your sleep and walk today.

Hello my sister @oceangirl

Mr shaz is on antidepessants which did not seem to make a difference , so the specialist had to put him on anti anxiety medications as well to get any results with some side affects and he still has ups and downs everyday

Hello @Phoenix_Rising