Are you happy being diganoused?

This might be a bit of a personal question but if you want to share please do. Are you happy having been diganoused? Do you like knowing there is a name to your mental illness?

For me like most I spent a lot of time not knowing why I acted the way I did (bipolar) I just thought well I don't know what I thought. I knew something was wrong and I hated it but I just didn't know.

Since been diganoused I can look at every moment in my past and understand why I reacted to certain things and acted the way I did. It all makes sense. Anyone else the same on that? Like a light bolb moment?

Also since my diganoused I feel I put my mental illness first. Like everything I do I think will this trigger and episode. Before I was diganoused I didn't think certain things triggered me off. I had zero clue what was happening.

When I get excited, sad, angry, stressed or any emotion I take a moment and go is my reaction normal. Is it a reaction due to my mental illness, or am I tiered, is it pms, or am I just having regular everyday emotions?

Like sometimes I wish I didn't know what was wrong with me so I could just live life with knowing something is obviously wrong with me but what I don't know so I don't understand what I did and never had to pause.

But then another part of me likes knowing what's wrong because I can try plan my life and know the warning signs.

But then I hate it.

Sorry heads in over drive and just trying to figure things out.