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birthmotherSenior Contributor
My catalyst ... my grand daughter completed suicide. She was 16. I had met her maybe 4 times. I did not get notified of the funeral. I did get an invitation to the memorial but I didnt open it. I thought is was something else. It was a facebook invitation/pm. I missed the memorial. My beautiful grand daughter, not thiers.
There is.so.much.guilt. So.much.....
In response to: suicide trigger warning
Zoe7Senior Contributor
@birthmother Just wanted to let you know that I hear you and I am so sorry that you went through this - and still are. My thoughts are with you 
In response to: suicide trigger warning
utopiaSenior Contributor
In response to: suicide trigger warning
utopiaSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: suicide trigger warning
birthmotherSenior Contributor
not yet. I am trying to work on that. I have appointments made.
Guilt and shame make for good bedfellows.
In response to: Re: suicide trigger warning
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Oh @birthmother a lot of us have those bedfellows - you are in great company
In response to: Re: suicide trigger warning
birthmotherSenior Contributor
In response to: suicide trigger warning
birthmotherSenior Contributor
so am I mentally unwell ... what happens when I self diagnose cptsd? or am i sad.. so bloody sad. My baby would have been fine with me. She was not better off. My poor baby 😞
In response to: Re: suicide trigger warning
Phoenix_RisingSenior Contributor
@birthmother I am so very sad to hear about the loss of your grand-daughter. You pose the question of whether you are mentally unwell or sad. My personal view is that as a society, we tend to pathologise sadness and grief, but I accept that others will hold different views. Sadness and grief are totally normal responses to loss.
Of course, it is entirely possible to be both sad and mentally unwell; people with a mental illness experience sadness, and sad people can have or develop a mental illness. Sometimes when we are very sad for a very long time, it changes the chemistry of our brain and this can lead to depression. Thus, while grief itself is not a mental illness, if it continues unabated for a long time, it can lead to depression.
As to "what happens" if you self-diagnose yourself with cptsd, well, nothing really "happens." It can provide a valuable starting point for figuring out the way forward. For example, it might inform the sort of therapist you might want to try connecting with, or it might help you to find useful resources such as books or support groups.
There are quite a few people here in Forum Land with cptsd, so I hope you are able to feel supported here. 
In response to: Re: suicide trigger warning
birthmotherSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: suicide trigger warning
Unknown userMember
Hi @birthmother
i'm sorry for your loss and situation 😞
I'm not sure we've 'met' so Hello and welcome to the forums.
I would say that it would be good just to go and talk with a psychologist/GP/counsellor about your situation and how its affecting you, rather than worrying so much about a diagnosis that may come out of it. I've also found that it really depends on who you see as to what diagnosis you have. My last GP focussed on one thing in particular as being very important, the GP who i have recently tried has bounced off in another direction completely and the two different reports that psychiatrists wrote about me were quite different in ways that felt very significant to me though there were also common elements.
I think what is more important than any diagnosis is that the things/symptoms that are hurting you are acknowledged and that you receive support/help for. (i hope that makes sense)!
take care,
lj
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
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