what to help anxiety through the day ?

Hello @Shaz51

I drink chamomile tea

listen to calming music

give him a gentle massage

pat an animal

focus on nature and talk about everything he sees to himself or to you

go for a walk

art

read a book

Hello @Shaz51 and Mr Shaz,

This is a great question, for me it is:

- eating healthy

- limiting caffein

- also listening to nice positive music

- sitting in the sunshine when I can

- having something nice planned for the night or the week (something to look forward to)

- writing to do lists that are achievable and crossing them off as they day goes by

- going for a walk or doing a pilates class

Also, knowing that some days doing all of this cannot happen which is okay, try to allow myself to feel anxious sometimes and looking after myself if I find it goes on for too long.

🙂 🙂 🙂

Thank you @Former-Member, @Former-Member

we are self employed , and usually we have jobs when the customers are not home -- this is the only way that hubby can cope

but yesterday the customer was home and hubby said he had a anxiety attack -- what is the best thing he can do to help him

Hmmm that is a good question @Shaz51, perhaps it's best to notice when he starts to feel extra anxious and really focus on doing something that makes him feel calm and relaxed, I am not sure what works for him but perhaps it's taking a walk around the block or getting out of the house is some way, when he starts to feel his chest tighten before the panic attack... could he do something like that?

Thank you @Former-Member

yes , I am usually with him so when I start to see it , I get him to sit for a while , have some water

sometimes he freezes when mowing someone`s lawn , he can`t move , sometimes we have packed up and go home , other times we have finished the mowing and then he is soo exhausted and needs to have a sleep

Oh yes that sounds really hard if the panic attack comes on when he is on the job, it sounds like you have a pretty good plan when he starts to feel that way, perhaps also writing a daily journal might help him track back other things that trigger the panic and find some ways of coping with that too?

But yes sitting down, taking a break, drinking some water all sound really helpful in that very moment @Shaz51 ❤️

Hi @Shaz51 & Mr shaz

I think doing the journal helps, I did that for while and it helped me see patterns within myself.

I always find doing something both relaxing and physical to tire you out helps (ie. gardening, playing with dog, having cuddles with pets.)

What about music, if he wore head phones or something while he worked as a distraction? Or maybe even working through it on a piece of paper to see the logical answer. For example he cant mow the lawn when customer is home, write down the facts and then analyse like what will happen if the customer is at home, will they get angry for some reason, will they even care, what will it matter etc etc just so you can have your reasons in writing and see that there is no threat. I hope this makes sense.

I still get those physcial effects from panic attacks etc but i dont freak out emotionally as much anymore as I have made myself realise that nothing bad will happen.

Take care @Shaz51

hello @Shaz51

I think that what you are doing for Mr Shaz is brilliant.

You are firstly respecting him. You are also mindful of his dignity. You are enabling him to feel safe. You are showing him that his feelings and symptoms are valid.

You are distracting him without putting the emphasis on what you are doing

He is drinking he may even be slightly dehydrated often when we are on medication and having panic attacks our anxiety blocks our normal recognition of being thirsty.

What works best for me I believe comes under the umbrella of grounding at the same time breathing from my diaphragm. Important with the breathing, breathe gently, slowly at first. You should be able to see his stomach move up and down. if you ask him to put his hand on his stomach whilst this is happening he will understand.

Grounding, something as simple as looking at nature, something in the garden where you are working. talk about the colours, shapes, size,flowers, branches, stems, trunk let your mind expand with his.

practising this when he is not having a panic attack would help him see that he is safe. Basically focussing on one thing and noticing as much as you can about that one thing until you notice the panic attack receding.

Lastly softly talking to him, reassuring that you will stay with him, you will not leave him while he is feeling that way; you will ensure his safety. Important not to let him feel that he is being rushed.

you will be guided by him whether he wants to continue talking or just sit and feel himself coming back to the now out of his fear of the future.

hope that I haven't rambled. I just found all of this sort of thing was what i would have loved to have had at the times when my panic attacks were severe.

I have mine under control now utilising these methods. What works for different people will be different of course. At least these are some samples that he might like to try.

One more thing, remember your own breathing, are you holding your breath whilst you are looking after Mr Shaz? Look after Mrs Shaz at all times

xxxx

thank you @Former-Member, @Change123, @Former-Member

remember your own breathing, are you holding your breath whilst you are looking after Mr Shaz? Look after Mrs Shaz at all times

you are sooo right @Former-Member, sometimes I am watching hubby too much and forget all about me , by the end of the day I am sooo tired myself xx