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Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Supporting and being there for others when they are going through a rough time is one of the most selfless things we can do. However, we can't be effective if our own mental health is compromised.

During this Topic Tuesday we will tackle questions like:

- How do I create and enforce my own boundaries without hurting the person I'm supporting?

- What are the different forms of support people find helpful?

- What can I do when supporting someone impacts on my own mental health?

248 replies

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In response to: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Correct me if I am wrong @NikNik...

compassion fatigue is a gradual lessening of compassion over time...

whereas burn out is a result of constant stress that impacts upon you more suddenly

@Former-Member

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

What about when your Husband says "You need one of my meds to help you cope with me " @NikNik

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

I found the forum before Christmas and was responding to many many posts and getting so overwhelmed over time I haven't been on as much I still read a lot but not respond

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Compassion fatigue

Warning signs - cognition

  • Intrusive thoughts and/or images of consumers’ traumatic situations
  • Developing a worldview in terms of victims and perpetrators
  • Decreased sense of safety
  • Increased suspicion of others
  • Decreased trust in others
  • Diminished feelings of personal control and freedom
  • Feelings of therapeutic impotence/helplessness
  • Loss of hope
  • Guilt
  • Victim-blaming
  • Diminished sense of purpose, accomplishment, or enjoyment of work
  • Difficulties with attention and concentration
  • Increased forgetfulness

Warning signs – psychological / emotional warning signs

  • Increased anger and irritability
  • Lower frustration tolerance
  • Depression
  • Decreased ability to feel joy
  • Increased feelings of anxiety
  • Feelings of horror or dread
  • Inability to maintain balance between empathy and objectivity
  • Feeling unappreciated, alienated, and isolated
  • Emotional withdrawal from colleagues, friends, and family
  • Over-identification with person you’re supporting

Warning signs – Physical

  • Chronic fatigue
  • Increased somatic complaints (headache, stomach aches, back pain, etc.)
  • Increased muscle tension
  • Physiological arousal in the form of palpitations and hypervigilance

  • Warning signs – behavioural
  • Difficulty sleeping (insomnia or oversleeping)
  • Workaholism
  • Increase in addictive behaviors such as compulsive eating or substance abuse
  • Impairment in day-to-day functioning including missed or cancelled appointments
  • Increased isolation
  • Chronic lateness
  • Increased absenteeism from work

Compassion fatigue is different to burn out, but can have related warning signs. However, the main differences are compassion fatigue can happen quickly and is mostly focused on a person or one element of your life (ie: a nurse may still be able to show compassion and support for a family member or friend, but not patients or collegues). While it's quick to come, it can also be quick to go, especially when focusing on self-care.

While burn out is a slow burn (see what I did there?) It often is related to a number of things in your life building up and spilling over, so it's gradual. It often hits us harder and can be longer to recover from.

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Thanks @Zoe7 i Understand now

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

ah i thought they were same thing

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Sounds like your husband might be using a bit of black humour there @Shaz51 !
He must be very aware and thankful for all the support you provide him.

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Close @Zoe7 see above in bold

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

no worries @BlueBay - you're practicing self care during a self care topic tuesday!
Take care Bluebay - Looking forward to connecting with you again soon.

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

@NikNik. Yep, it is super hard having had dozens of people leave my world. The first was in 1997 and the last was in November of last year. I'm done with the "real" human interaction now (as opposed to online interaction). Over the years, as I developed more insight into my muddle, I would tell people "do not get closer to me than you can sustain." But alas, oh-so-many people somehow thought that they were special and that they were THE ONE who was going to be able to "fix" my muddle. They would dive in, realise how big my muddle was, and then dive out again, which just made my muddle bigger. That is super super SUPER unhelpful!

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