Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

The big lurking fear is that I'll always be tied to someone else's overwhelming needs.

Ariel - i know that feeling all too well... Except it isn't so much them being ashamed of it (which they are, to the point they appologise for existing). It is more that noone wants to hear me "complaining" about my situation. Or they don't realise how constantly I have to care for or keep an eye on him.

More self-care 'tips' :

- not reading posts that may be potentially triggering

- quickly 'scanning' posts for triggering content and then moving on without reading

- referring a member to the appropriate 'services' or asking for moderatior intervention if feeling 'out of ones depth'

- taking 'time out' if triggered by a post and responding at a later time when more able to think logically rather than emotionally

Hello @Heathcliff, @NikNik

@Heathcliff my husband does not talk about his anxiety and panic issues, until it is nearly too late and has forgotten what and how it started , he would go all day not saying a word

and when he does , I say why didn`t you tell me sooner

so i have had a couple of burnouts

Restricting notifications and threads that you 'subscribe' to is another way to care for yourself - you can then support others that you are most 'familiar' with and are less likely to 'say the wrong thing' or become engaged in a triggering situation for yourself.

I guess the thing that is speaking volumes to me right now is that I don't have any self care tips to share 😳😔

These are great responses!

What I'm hearing from you all practicing self care helps you:

• Be self aware

• take care of my own needs first.

• do what feels right for me at that moment

• finding other ways to show support

• Be aware of your own personal vulnerabilities, such as the potential for retraumatization (if you have a trauma history), vicarious or secondary traumatization (if you work with individuals who report their own traumatic experiences), and compassion fatigue (which you can develop from a combination of burnout and vicarious traumatization).

• Be able to support people better and more effectively

• Achieve more balance in your life, by maintaining and enhancing the attention you pay to the different domains of your life in a way that makes sense to you

So many coming through. Sorry to the ones I've missed!

@Former-Member I have a very, very similar issue. I feel like I have never really had the chance to learn self care.