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han2828Casual Contributor
is there anyone that can tell me how the heck to navigate trauma when you don’t have a support system? I’m fine most days and then out of blue it hits me that my life is fucked and I have no one to talk to. I gets every depressed and suicidal but I don’t want to be a burden so I do my best to suppress and move on.. usually doesn’t work and I end up feeling worse..
In response to: Struggling
BAOModerator
Welcome to the forums @han2828 ,
It sounds like a pretty difficult time when you are alone and the overwhelming feeling comes.
Have you built up anything in your tool kit that might work? e.g. going for walks, doing something you enjoy, engaging in a hobby.
I wonder if you'd be interested in connecting with SANE's RecoveryClub to see if this is something you can talk about and work on towards your recovery? You are welcome to see if this service is something you might want to access: https://www.sane.org/recovery-club
When you're feeling down, have you ever called Beyond Blue? 1300 224 636
In response to: Struggling
Grey_SkyContributor
I cant offer any advice but am in the same boat. I have no one to talk to. Most people dont know what I'm going through and it seems that the one person who might have an idea (my mother) doesnt seem to care or know how to deal with it. I just joined this forum hoping to be able to discuss some issues and feel less alone.
In response to: Struggling
Misty7Senior Contributor
Hi@han2828,
I understand how you feel. I too suffer from Cptsd. That is a very good question how do you heal if you don't have a support system? You said that you don't want to be a burden. Who are you a burden to? Are you currently seeing a psychologist?
In response to: Struggling
RadderSenior Contributor
Hi @han2828 @Grey_Sky
Have you tried Roses in the Ocean Warmline? Its not an immediate connection, but they will match you to a lived experience peer who will call you back for a chat within a few hours (max 24 hrs).
They won't automatically call 000 just because you mention thoughts of suicide
You may find other suitable peer groups at MHFA
In response to: Struggling
EternalFlowerSenior Contributor
hey @han2828 very similar. My siblings are medical professionals and look down on me for my mental illness. My family isn't supportive.
i feel exactly the same. I find when i'm depressed i watch a lot of depressing stuff on tv and let the emotions process that way. Not sure if its so good
Re no support system, to be honest, I find i do have one or 2 friends who get it but i also isolate fromthem at times. I have more friends that dont get it.
Its very hard to explain when cptsd gets bad. It can be like its all happening over again.
I had the smallest trigger because I have been agoraphobic so i asked my neighbour if they could get me some milk at the supermarket. She said she'd love to help and did i need anything else.
I said no just milk thank you.
1 week went by and she texted me about something else entirely unrelated, saying my car window seemed open. I asked her what happened to the milk and she just said she didn't get it and wouldn't as her situaton changed during the week. I was confused why she didn'et tell me. I ended up really shutting down and not asking for any more help over the nexxt few weeks.
Sometimes the trigger is feeling alone and that no one cares, which can be true, or it could be that some ppl do care and i focus on the ones that dont.
I hope ur having an ok weekend. Do u have any formal supports like therapy or whatever? I do lean on my psychologist a bit.
In response to: Struggling
han2828Casual Contributor
I appreciate all of your repsonses. I’ve been doing badly lately and have neglected social connection. I just brought a motorbike and that has fueled my lingering suicidal thoughts [edited by moderator]. I’m trying to find every and any inch of me to keep fighting. I hate that I need alcohol to make me release tears but it also increases my negative emotions so it’s a risky situation. I just wish I had people I could reach out to when I’m feeling like this so I could vent.
In response to: Struggling
han2828Casual Contributor
my boss has been the biggest supporter in my life but I cannot continue to reach out to her. She has her own stuff going on and I don’t want to be the person who reaches out everytime shit gets bad. I just wish I knew how to fix my head. Everything is so dark and heavy and I can’t afford therapy right now
In response to: Struggling
han2828Casual Contributor
I’m sorry they look down on you.. that’s really unfair !!
I don’t have any professional support at the moment as it costs a lot and I just can’t afford it. I also really really hate reaching out especially in person because I struggle to admit that I’m struggling when I’m face to face. As stupid as it is, my mind is always convincing me that killing myself is better than asking for help. I hate it but I don’t know how to fight it
In response to: Struggling
han2828Casual Contributor
Totally get that! It’s very frustrating not getting support from the few people who should give it to you. I may struggle but I’m always open ears for anybody that needs it
In response to: Struggling
JynxModerator
Hi @han2828
First off just letting you know I've edited your post to remove reference to a suicide method. Our guidelines ask members refrain from sharing descriptions of suicide and self-harm methods, in order to help keep the community safe and avoid potentially triggering other members. Let us know if you have any concerns. Read more about the guidelines here:
https://saneforums.org/articles/community-guidelines
I can understand both the feelings of being burdensome, and of how difficult it can be to admit we need help. I think we're bombarded from a young age with the messaging that 'If you can't cope with life alone, you're a failure' - but it's just not true. Humans are supposed to lean on each other, it's what we evolved to do. I can imagine your boss would prefer to hear about your struggles, than to not hear from you again.
I'm glad that you're reaching out here, sounds like this feels safer for you than to try to talk face-to-face with someone. It's a great way to practice saying 'Hey, I'm not okay' - the more you do, the easier it may be in the future to say it out loud. If typing feels easier, I'd recommend getting in touch with Lifeline/SCBS chat-based services whenever you feel the thoughts are getting heavy:
Lifeline: Phone - Call 13 11 14
Chat – Visit https://www.lifeline.org.au/crisis-chat/
Suicide Callback Service: Phone – Call 1300 659 467
Chat – Visit https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/
Also, you might benefit from reading some of the stories and resources shared on our Better Off With You website:
https://betteroffwithyou.org.au/
You've taken an amazing step by sharing with us here. It does get easier to talk about, bit by bit. Keep at it, because you don't deserve to be alone in this.
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.
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