My partner cut ties during psychosis and I’m not coming

Hey there @beyondconfuswd,

Welcome to the SANE forums, I hope that you'll find the support that you need here 🤝

It sounds like things are really tough for you right now, and your partner's actions have left you feeling really confused and devastated. It's understandable to find it difficult to smile at the moment, when everything happened so quickly and what seems like without a warning.

Psychosis can make people lose track of their own identity and with that, the relationships around them 😔Although you're really hurting right now, it might be helpful to remember that isn't a true reflection of your partner's feelings towards you or your relationship.

Coping with the impacts of a family member's mental health illness is rarely easy, so I encourage you to reflect if it would be beneficial to get support for yourself and the kids. If jumping into face to face counselling sounds overwhelming, it's always okay to try phone or online options like The Carer Gateway (https://www.carergateway.gov.au/your-life-carer/your-life-around-caring/who-caring/caring-mental-illness to) see if it's something that you would find helpful.

It's okay to take things one step a time, and to be gentle with yourself during this time!

@beyondconfuswd i broke up my marraige when i was in the midst of a psychosis. he left and continued an affair and finally married her. he now has dementia. imho if you truly love him stand by him. he is not himself atm and may not be for some time yet. he needs you to be there in the wings. it will be a bumpy ride and you must look after yourself. stay strong.

@Bunniekins how did you deal with the grief after? i’ve just felt some intense emotions and cried on a plane home after finding my ex-partner of nearly a decade to not want to continue a relationship with me after psychosis (I’m only now coming out of it and seeing the events of the last year as they were) and I feel so unworthy of love and ashamed. I feel like it is my fault. I feel like I was too slow to take my meds, to recover, to get better. I feel like I won’t be loved again because of it now. My family were angry and disappointed when I came home when I entered this episode because he couldn’t look after me and I broke up with him out of anger and paranoia. It was exhausting for them too - but I’m still hurt. It hurts so much to feel misunderstood and alone. There’s so much stigma around psychosis. He specifically said that my episode was very disruptive and it would be hard to experience again when I met up to talk to him. It has reaffirmed this negative thought loop on my mind. Having another episode is now my biggest fear and I am trying my best to make sure it doesn’t happen again.