Riding a wave

It's now 4:15pm. How is any progress going to be made today? I was told the conversation would continue today. All I do is lie in bed or sit at the computer waiting for the next email to come, not knowing if it is going to help or harm. THREE MONTHS this has been going on. I get told to use the appropriate channels, I do that, and I don't get responded to. Why can't anyone HEAR me???

Waiting is hard isn't it @Phoenix_Rising none of us can take that away for you and make time go faster unfortunately 😞 I hear that it is horrible to be sitting in that uncertainty today, we are hearing you right here so perhaps we can do something that helps you focus on now and a way of looking after yourself. What are some of your DBT skills you can use, the egg balancing one is a good one from what you have said, just something to help ease the anxiety 🙂

...and I just got an email to say oh I'm sorry, I ran out of time today. I am supposed to go to my volunteering gig tomorrow but I will be cancelling so that I can be here to deal with this. I haven't spoken to another human being (aside from my trip to Spotlight) since Monday when I saw TTT. I am in utter crisis. Follow the appropriate channels they say. Well I DO. I TRY so so so SO hard. I was told this would get followed up today. I waited all day. It has been THREE MONTHS!!!!!!

I do not matter,

I'm only one person,

Destroy me completely,

Then throw me away.

I TRY!!!!!! I try SO HARD to use the appropriate channels. But I am ignored. Why won't they simply TALK about it??? All I do is wait. I wait and I wait and I wait and then I get smashed and then I wait and I wait and I wait and then I get smashed and then I wait and I wait and I wait and then I get smashed. THREE MONTHS this has been going on. I TRY. I try SO HARD, but I just keep getting smashed at every single turn!

@Phoenix_Rising

None of this makes sense to me @Former-Member. I am using the appropriate channels but I'm being ignored. What do I do?????? How do I "reach out for support?" I'm not supposed to talk about it here, so I'm trying to talk about it there, but no one is responding to me. I've been waiting on one response since last FRIDAY. WHAT DO I DO??? What does it mean for me to "reach out for support?" I'm TRYING. I'm trying SO HARD!!!!!

I do not matter,

I'm only one person,

Destroy me completely,

Then throw me away.

Shhhhhhh don't tell.

How is this supposed to WORK @Former-Member??? I FOLLOWED the rules. I USED the appropriate channels. Why won't anybody hear me???

You are reaching out for support on the forum @Phoenix_Rising which is good, this is a peer to peer support platform so me as a moderator and others as members can try to support you in the way the forum allows us to.

We could work on supporting you to make you feel more calm this afternoon, and running over the details over and over again does not seem to be making you feel calm. Are you willing to try doing something else on the forums ?