Riding a wave

@CheerBear thats so lovely to hear

Some days I can be speedy on my island @Phoenix_Rising

@CheerBear Ok, I will do that. I won't get it done today, but over the weekend I'll go through the Topic Tuesday thread to find everyone, and I'll draft a post. Giggle...I love that you and @Former-Member are trusting me to write a post inviting people to the thread. Methinks the Sunday moderator wouldn't share your confidence in me. And yes, I need to keep talking about it and joking about it, in order to keep processing it.

If you are going to do that sometime over the weekend @Phoenix_Rising would you like me to 'proof-read' first - just in case there are any - um - let's call them misunderstandings lol - that needs someone who speaks turtle to change into forum-friendly speech

Just in case you are unaware (and I am nearly 100% certain you already will be...) those that you tag into the DBT thread (from the DBT thread) will only get ongoing notifications if they reply to a post (and then don't turn off notifications). So a post worded like @Former-Member has suggested would let them know about the thread and then it is up to each member as to whether they read, post or get further notifications. Maybe it would be a good idea to 'inform' members fromTopic Tuesday of the DBT thread by posting in TT and including a link to the DBT thread - then it is entirely up to the individual member if they want to follow up and visit the DBT thread....

This is a super quick flyby to say that I'm going to be out and about this evening and I'm not sure if I will make it to FF. Try to be good, and someone please keep a close eye on @CheerBear - she has a terrible habit of ending up in entirely the wrong destination!

@Zoe7 Giggle. I will definitely only be DRAFTING the post over the weekend. I definitely do not anticipate this little turtle will be doing any posting in Forum Land between 10pm tonight and 8am Monday morning!

@Zoe7 Are you saying it would be best to post the invitation in the Topic Tuesday thread with a link to the DBT thread? That sounds super wise. Thank you for being so clever.

See @Phoenix_Rising I dont like grey either lol - so posting in Topic Tuesday thread seems to me to be the best option - you still 'reach' your target audience but there is no pressure to visit the DBT thread unless they want to - any possible triggers and/or 'misunderstandings' are then completely avoided

If you do decide to 'visit' over the weekend - I am hiding in F&H's tent in TOR ALL weekend - so bring your pillow and blanket and snuggle in there with me (we will of course be surrounded by teddies also) I will try to keep track of CB tonight for you - but from a distance - may need to set up some CCTV cameras that feed into the tent to do that and give her a walky talky so she can check in with me in Tent Headquarters

@Former-Member are you watching over the ocean tonight? I am super struggling. I have just got home after being out for most of the day. I was doing a fun thing, but no matter where I am or what I am doing, the weight of the hopelessness of my situation is super overwhelming me. Before I'd even arrived home, I was in tears again.

How can I possibly be in exactly the same situation with my turtle whisperer, that I was in with (K)!!! I've found someone who genuinely speaks turtle and who could genuinely help me...and yet she is inaccessible in terms of actually helping me heal my brain. I want to fix my brain!!!! I want to FIX it. I don't know how to keep on keeping on, when I am on a road to nowhere.

CheerBear and I were talking on the DBT thread about how super invalidating people's attempts at positive reframing can often be. I super experience that with respect to my therapist shopping efforts. For example, it super bugs me when I try to share my utter despair over this situation and get told in response "I can hear that you are frustrated." It isn't frustration, it is utter despair!!!! Frustration is what I feel when I get home from shopping and realise I've forgotten something. Frustration is what I feel when I can't get the lid off a jar. Frustration is what I feel when a store doesn't have something in stock that I'm wanting to buy. That is frustration. What I am experiencing regarding my turtle whisperer and the consequent necessity of further therapist shopping is not frustration - it is utter utter utter despair!!!!! How do I keep on keeping on, when I am on a road to nowhere???

All I want in the whole world is to feel safe. I NEED to feel safe. Having a sense of safety would help my muddled brain SO MUCH. But how do I ever feel safe when the objective reality is that I am utterly alone in this world???

Yesterday I had to fill out an online form for something. It wouldn't let me proceed without listing an emergency contact number. And so, as I did with my yoga class, I entered a completely random name and number so that I could submit the form. How can anyone ever feel safe when they are that utterly alone in the world??? I'm scared @Former-Member. I'm SO SCARED!!!!!

Anyway, I hope you and everyone had fun at FF tonight. I am super sleepy and I need to bunker down in my underwater cave now. You will watch over the ocean??? After last Sunday's adventure, I'm not planning to return to Forum Land until Monday morning.

Good night @Former-Member. Good night Forum Land.

I am here @Phoenix_Rising. I can hear how overwhelming hopeless the muddle is feeling tonight. Bunker down in the underwater cave and let this storm pass.

I am watching over the ocean tonight and genuinely hope there are calmer seas on the horizon. Have a good sleep @Phoenix_Rising and we will see you when you are back here on Monday morning

Good afternoon @Phoenix_Rising

Just letting you know I am here for you