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Managing relationships

Self-Sabotage

Self-Sabotage

I hope it's not weird to post this. About two weeks ago, I took a single-day course and noticed a cute person there signalling interest. It was the first time I've felt mutual attraction and safe in the interaction, but we didn't talk. I think they were testing the waters, and even though I kept thinking of how I could positively respond, I ultimately didn't act. My mind kept rationalising based on former negative experiences about "being too much" or "not enough" why I had to be careful. This person was trying to set up a way to approach me, but I ended up leaving early to catch a bus urgently (a bad habit of anxiety I have) and lost my chance in the process. It's rare I feel that way about someone and it's worse when this person is the most attractive all-round impression I've come across. As I left, they looked really disappointed which makes it hurt more. I've been severely depressed since because I don't feel confident I'll have another attraction like that again. I've waited so many years to feel seen like that, to feel like someone wanted to know me, and I feel like I betrayed myself. I have a lot of self-hatred and deep regret. I don't know what to think anymore and I'd appreciate some perspective or advice on how to cope with the loss of an opportunity like that.

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In response to: Self-Sabotage

Re: Self-Sabotage

I haven't decided what I'll do with my niblings yet @WretchedKid . They want simple stuff like me taking them to starbucks... like that's the simplest thing they can ask for.

Funny thing, my sister (their mum) is going out without the kids, so I can then take the kids out later. I bought new airpods for the kids to give their mum lol...

What are you up to at the moment?

In response to: Re: Self-Sabotage

Re: Self-Sabotage

@tyme - Niblings is a funny term. I won’t deny I’m now curious if the kids actually celebrated with the mum or if this is her idea of a good day lol Speaking about those airpods…

Just had a nap. Gonna keep gaming! What about you?

In response to: Re: Self-Sabotage

Re: Self-Sabotage

Her circle of friends didn't have anything for mothers' day so they all got together to have their own outing and celebration. lol. They all left their kids at home hahaha.

I like having the kids home. I just spoil them 🙂 @WretchedKid

What'd you get up to today?

In response to: Re: Self-Sabotage

Re: Self-Sabotage

That's very nice, @tyme. It's good to hear you find happiness in doing something for the kids and spending time with them. I hope you're having a good weekend!

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