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Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Just been crying and had a mental breakdown. I've been good with money, spending within my means, but parent keeps asking for more and more for things not needed, basically extras. Sibling going to uni and not getting a job, when I was in uni, I had to pay for everything myself except for the first semester which was paid with the help of my parent. Worked my butt off and managed to do it. Now that my sibling is in uni, I'm always asked to help out to get a job to help the family for a trip later this year and sibling is not getting a job or hard enough. I am so tired, everything always come back to me having to do stuff. I worked since I was legally able too and basically have almost always been employed, I don't overspend and just want a relax life, but everybody is pushing the responsibility onto me. I am so tired and my mental just finally cracked. I just don't know how to feel, I just want to escape this

for a while.

How do I stop this feeling and just escape for a while, like I just need a break for a couple of days from this stress of hey you need to get a job to pay for all of these extra things that we did.

Its just so exhausting since I myself don't spend much on myself. It's always payments for other people.

I guess in terms of the job stuff I'm just going to say no to them since I'm so tired and am supposed to be on medical leave from the doctor to fix health up anyways, but they still want me to get a job instead of focusing on my health. Though just need a way to manage the stress and thoughts of them brining up topics of finances etc, I'm tired of this.

18 replies

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In response to: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Hey @Determined, thanks for reaching out and replying.

Yeah, its just one of those hard ones since it's family, not like its someone you don't know random off the streets or something, it's people you love and it's just so hard.

Looks like you've also been in the same position as I have but for a lot longer how, I appreciate that you hear me. Although it may not seem much, it means a lot to me, as situations like these are more complex to get out off and to prevent going into a loop.

Just hope I'm able to figure something out so I'm not super stressed about it.

I hope you take care of yourself @Determined, I can only imagine the struggle you're going through.

In response to: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Thank you @Determined. I just checked up on the forums today so I didn't see anything until today, though I'll be thinking of you and wishing for the best for you as well.

I hope you take some rest as well, and also do the same for yourself to take care of yourself.

It's a hard one situations like these.

In response to: Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

We are @cozy_726 .

Thinking if you.

In response to: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Hey @cozy_726 , It's a lot of pressure on you. So I guess if you can talk to them here and there, then it lightens the pressure a bit.

You deserve to be seen and heard.

Then again, is this something you can share with your sibling too? After all, why should you have all the pressure when they get to 'cruize' along?

As much as you want to support everyone, you need to remember yourself too.

We're here for you.

In response to: Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Hi @tyme, not sure as I've tried to talk to them but the pressure is still there and the guilt etc sort of builds up, well not really guilt, I guess the feeling of selfishness to take a break.

At this moment I just feel stressed out and feel numb at the same time. To be honest I've been feeling numb for a couple days now, I just don't want anything to do for a while and to just close my eyes and rest without thinking of all this stuff.

At this moment, it just feels like I'm going back to my depression stuff again, or maybe this is me burning out, but either way I'm so tired and just want to focus on my own little world away from everything.

I wish my sibling would help, I'm just so exhausted.

I thank you so much for this forum existing and just being here really, it means a lot to have people help or at least try to help where possible.

Ty
Cozy

In response to: Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

And yeah, in regards to the supporting myself thing, definitely need to do that and just practice that a whole lot more.

In response to: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Alright, just cleared my head a bit. I'm going to take it step by step. It was recommended to me that of course I can still apply for jobs as it'll take a while anyways and I think that's something I'll start to do, just little by little, slowly add things to the things I need to do daily.

I think for me, this being in bed has been horrible for me, but I feel like I need to go slowly in doing everything again, this feels just like how I got out of my depression situation a while back, bit by bit.

Hoping things go well.

In response to: Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

Re: Responsibility for others driving me to breakdown

I'm hearing you about the stress and guilt you experience. If you have spoken to your family, have they taken heed at all?

Honestly speaking, upon reflection, do you think the pressure is internal in that you feel you need to be responsible, or do you think it is imposed on you?

Sometimes, we may end up doing things to 'save' others, but we end up burning ourselves out from it all.

Just SAY, you stopped some of the responsibilities that you are currently holding onto... what will happen?

Food for thought @cozy_726

Thinking of you and looking forward to hearing from you.

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