Hi @pineapple0000
Firstly, welcome to the forums. I hope you find what you are looking for here.
I can completely understand what you are going through.
My mum has dementia and went into a care home about 3 months ago. Up until then she was living with me and my family.
The feelings of grief are perfectly normal. I have them too. I have already started grieving for her.
I grieve for all the things she cannot do, I grieve for the memories she has lost, I grieve just for the everyday things she struggles with. With each deterioration for her, I find it very difficult to cope with. And it's so hard. Whilst you can talk to others who have gone through this or are going through this, each person's journey unique. They deteriorate in different ways. I am finding it to feel like a marathon.
I’m struggling too with what this terrible disease is taking for her and from us.
She has changed so much and is not the person I know she was for the last 45 years of my life.
If you haven't already I suggest you get in contact with Home | Dementia Australia
I have found them to be really helpful. They have lots of information on dementia and the different stages. There is a dementia helpline 1800 100 500 that I have contacted many times, mostly when I was really upset and not coping well. They listen and also can help you with different resources/help that might help your own family. They also offer free counselling for family members. I would highly encourage you to contact them.
I hope this helps and you realise you are not alone. What you are experiencing is very normal.
I am happy to answer any more questions you have if needed, am only a tag away.
Please take care of you first.