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General chit chat

General chit chat

Hi@Faith-and-Hope, @utopia, @Mazarita

I'm still not very good at 'navagating' this site, maybe that's why I kept trying 'instant' chat sites - they seemed easier. But I like that messages can be checked, that it's not instant feels like some sort of barrier against instant shock I suppose - though I know this is a public Internet site so anyone can use it. I also think, though I hate the term Mental Illness, as I think it takes all the physical out of it, that the people that cause trauma probably suffer from it, so they would have just as much right to use it. But I feel a bit like typing I think, so I thought I might just blurb a little?
I've went away for a few days. I go every month. I visit the center of my Universe 🙂 The one person who has been there with/for me, their whole life & I believe will remain that way until I die 🙂 . . . & quite the large Family they have provided for me to share in 🙂 I go from, it almost seems like another Planet sometimes, my life is very quiet; to the center of my Universe, which includes 5 grand-children ranging in age from almost 2 to, going on 18; then there's the partner, the partners Parents and a large variety of friends 🙂 I often find myself thinking 'alein sound dimension' - there's so much noise on so many different levels! Every single one of them has every gadget known to mankind, and most of those gadgets make noise! And my World is a lot calmer, with a lot less going on - we're usually driving in the car, taking children to school, doing whatever shopping is necessary for the day in time for whatever seemingly endless appointment is due, . . . by the time my alarm goes off to make sure I wake up in time to get tired in time to go to sleep in time 😄 There's no way I could keep that pace up anymore! After a few days I find myself almost running away with my tail between my legs 🙂 But it's the perfect balance really, I do spend a lot of time alone - apart from my 3 furry, four-legged friends; but I am extremely lucky, my bond with my only child is of a strength I can't see breaking; I get a phone call or text every night & welcomed by a dozen open arms and smiling faces every month. I am lucky, I have a good life. Well, I think life is just a word, neither good nor bad. I have good experiences and I am happy 🙂

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In response to: General chit chat

Re: General chit chat

Sorry to hear about your hallucinations. That thing where you lose your filter on what you say is called 'disinhibition', @outlander. It's something I have to watch with my bipolar. If I don't I can end up acting in ways I wouldn't do otherwise too, to the extreme sometimes. It can be a side effect of some medications or a symptom of our mental health issues. Let's hope it doesn't continue happening with you.

In response to: Re: General chit chat

Re: General chit chat

Haha, we are so in sync, Niqua, that we keep posting at the same time!

Your day sounds good in the planning stage. I hope you get out the genny and mower too and achieve what you would like to be done. Always good though not to pressure too much so as to avoid anxiety and extra resistance getting in the way, (says me who has just pressured myself for a week getting housework done to insane standards )

Yes, I think I will do the trip today. But not just yet.

In response to: General chit chat

Re: General chit chat

I do get hallucinations quite abit however they arent often that bad like last night and its mostly the feeling of being watched and followed to the point last yr i smashed my new phone cause i thought people were tracking me. @Mazarita
And thank you for giving that a name. I am an honest person and ill give them my honest opinion but only if its asked but often i shrink away. In that state had of i had been talking to a bully for example there would have been no holding back.
I dont get into that state very often i tend to keep my thoughts to myself. It was happening here on the forums so had to be very careful the way i was phrasing things

In response to: Re: General chit chat

Re: General chit chat

Good that you are so aware of it, @outlander. You are going to be so ahead of the game as time goes on, in terms of your awareness of your mental health struggles, what they are and how to deal with them.

In response to: General chit chat

Re: General chit chat

Sorry to hear about what must have been a terrifying night Claire @outlander

But despite the harsh night, I can still hear the positive tone and am glad that your alive You are a very special, unique individual; your struggles are real, your wants & needs are important . . . you are very worthwhile

And that chaotic blur continues for you, I'm guessing the rta is a hospital, so even with your Pop being Ok {which is great} you still have your caring role to fulfill. I cared for my Mother for 3 months, she was palliative; but the stress was so much that I had to make a deadline in my head - if she had lived longer than 6 months I would have to have hospitalized her; I knew I would not be able to take any more {mainly of my Father}. Caring is a very difficult role. I understand a little, how endless and infiniite it can seem.

3 consecutive days of work, I guess it's good to get it all done together like that. Do you like it that way? I used to do 3 on, 1 off, 4 on - of 10 hour night shifts; but the rules changed & they weren't allowed to continue those shifts like that. I actually preferred it that way, I got the fortnight done in a week! & it often took me a couple of days to get to sleep, then I might sleep for a couple of days . . . but without the consecutive days off - I couldn't do that, so I couldn't sleep & I got very ill.

I'm pretty good today Claire 🙂 I hope your day picks up, or probaly more to the point drops down . . . to a very restful nap somewhere along the day 🙂

Niqua

In response to: General chit chat

Re: General chit chat

I still have lots and lots to learn @Mazarita just when i think ive worked it out something new happens! It never ends does it lol. But thank you ❤
How are you today?

In response to: Re: General chit chat

Re: General chit chat

Life is an ongoing learning experience, @outlander. That's how I've found it. The key for me is pacing myself moderately with things (including learning) whenever I can (don't always manage it still). I think that as long as we have life in us, no matter how old we are, there is still more to learn. Experience is a great teacher and you are in early here on the forum, picking up very valuable learning for the future. I have faith in your future. Not as a fairytale postcard, but as something much better than you have at the moment. Having said that, it does sound like things have overall improved since it's just you and your pop in the house for the most part.

In response to: General chit chat

Re: General chit chat

Im ok Niqua, things get rough sometimes and im not ok but im doing ok this past 2 weeks and thats a good start. Thank you for validating those feelings ❤

The rta isnt a hospital, its the roads and traffic service where we register the cars etc pop had to do his so i took him out there.
Caring is good but your right it can seem never ending and overwhelming esp when having to deal with my own stuff too.
I like the 3 consecutive days as then its out of the way sort of thing and keeps me occupied but i do tend to tire quickly since taking that long break from it. I didnt realise how much i was doing before!
I haven't actually done shift work more like the constant roles but i think if if was 10hr shifts i wouldnt like it so much as consecutive days but i guess tou dont particularly get a choice.
Im glad your going good today. Any more adventures coming up? @Former-Member

In response to: Re: General chit chat

Re: General chit chat

Everyday is an adventure Claire @outlander 🙂

Today I'm thinking of marching along a mechanical maze, full of flamable liquids, deliberately technicallly timed sparks, slippery oil & electricity! It'll give me the power to make the wonderful washing machine wash my clothes 😄 I might even use a simular method - flamable liquids, technical timing, oil & electricity - but with a much more mangling machine . . . the mower! - 4 spinning blades going at a million miles an hour - deadly adventure!!! 😄

I'm also going to take my puppies out into the World & let them risk their lives! Probably out in the State Forest, where I know there's fierce feral pigs & it's Australia so there's always snakes & spiders & other poisonious deadly creatures hiding in wait! 😉 A real Indianna Jane/Crocadile Niquadee thing going on there 😄

The most courageous thought I have for the day is to go into town, where there is a concentrated population of the most deadly creatures on the Planet!!! All a part of the 'everyday' life of this seasoned Adventurer 😄

Lots of love and smiles for you Claire

Niqua

In response to: Re: General chit chat

Re: General chit chat

Is tbere anyone around for a chat @Former-Member@outlander@Bimby2@Mazarita@CheerBear@Faith-and-Hope

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