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My partner is tired of capitalism

ipandaSenior Contributor17 Oct 2025, 2:45 pm AEDT

My partner is tired of capitalism

Hey everyone,

First time writing here.

I’m worried about my partner, I’m not looking for a diagnosis. I’m looking for others perspectives or tips for how to help or deal with it.

So, my partner is working in a dead end job, he doesn’t have any future in it. 6 months ago he was trying to get a new job, even start studying again, but now he lost the motivation. He keep saying that he just want to retire and that’s it.

He said that he doesn’t see the point anymore, he is clearly overwhelmed but he doesn’t want to go to therapy or anything like that.

When I ask him what he wants to do when he is retired, he doesn’t know. The only thing that he says is “anything but work”.

Another thing is, his job is very easy going, he work at home 3 times in the week, sometimes he has nothing to do, and even tho he is overwhelmed. I try to keep encouraging him to do a course that he wants, like painting or whatever, and he said that even he doesn’t have anything to do at work he can’t stop thinking about it. He also said that he is tired of corporate and bag managers. But don’t want to became one.

On weekends, besides doing house chores, the only thing he does is read reddit.

I don’t know what to do, should I just accept? His job pays the mortgage and everything else, while I’m looking for a job.

It seems that he is depressed, but he doesn’t want to go to therapy, he doesn’t see the point in going. He says that he is fine like that.

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In response to: My partner is tired of capitalism

ipandaSenior Contributor18 Oct 2025, 9:56 am AEDT

Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

Hey @chibam! Thank you for your thoughts!

I did suggest him to find a job that is more rewarding but he said he doesn’t want a job at all. He doesn’t want any job, he is tired of working and want to retire. We have 27/28 yo it’s impossible to retire now, we need to finish paying the mortgage first.

The ideia of therapy for me, would be more to investigate this feeling of don’t want a job and help him with self-knowledge.

Not wanting to work, it’s the reason that he doesn’t want to change jobs anymore, even though his current job it’s a dead end. I feel like he just gave up and it’s waiting to be retired, and in the meantime he doesn’t enjoy life. Every day he says that he doesn’t want to go to work, he doesn’t want to work anymore and want to be retired. He says that so much that it’s annoying sometimes.

Meanwhile I’m trying my best to get a job and want to work, and provide a better life for us.

Maybe we are just different, and I have to accept that he is like this?

He’s been saying this since we met but not as often as now. I just don’t think is a healthy thought. But I can be wrong.

In response to: Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

chibamSenior Contributor18 Oct 2025, 5:45 pm AEDT

Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

@ipanda wrote:
The ideia of therapy for me, would be more to investigate this feeling of don’t want a job and help him with self-knowledge.

For a lot of people, the problem isn't knowing themselves - that part is basic. The problem is trying to figure out how the rest of the world works , and how to handle them.

It's sort of strange that your partner doesn't have any aspirations that he wants to work towards. Maybe he's come to believe that his dreams are impossible, and so he just doesn't see any practical way of working towards them?

You mentioned that you are hoping to get a job soon. Is there a way that perhaps the two of you could get hired to work together as a 2-person team? Do you think that might be something he might want to pursue?

In response to: Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

ipandaSenior Contributor18 Oct 2025, 6:23 pm AEDT

Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

@chibam

I also think is strange, I talked to him about dreams and aspirations but he said that his dream is to be retired. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Our areas are really different, I don't earn as much as him. He has a good job that he can pay the mortgage and the bills by himself, my job would be to increase your savings, do some renovations and travelling. I did try to get a job in his area but I couldn't get to a interview.

In response to: Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

chibamSenior Contributor18 Oct 2025, 7:44 pm AEDT

Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

@ipanda

Is he as concerned about the money aspect as you are? Or does the prospect of being poor not really phase him?

In response to: Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

ipandaSenior Contributor19 Oct 2025, 11:21 pm AEDT

Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

@chibam

Sorry for the late reply.

So he is concerned about finishing paying the mortgage but he is not pressuring me to get a job, he wants me to be happy in a job that I choose. Sometimes he got worried but sometimes he doesn’t. So I don’t know, I asked him if he wants to volunteer with me and check it out others kinds of jobs and he is not interested. 😕

In response to: Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

chibamSenior Contributor21 Oct 2025, 3:03 am AEDT

Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

No problem, @ipanda 🙂

Well, I'm at a loss, then. 😐 It's hard to know what to suggest when the person doesn't seem to have any distinct idea of what they want.

I know some people are like that, but just really can't wrap my head around that sort of predicament, TBH.

I can better relate to people who simply don't say what they want, either because they've come to believe it's impossible, or because they've learned they get lashed out at when they tell people about it.

I wonder, if he found the magic lamp with the genie inside, who could grant him any wish, no matter how outrageous or impossible it seemed, does he know what he'd wish for?

In response to: Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

ipandaSenior Contributor22 Oct 2025, 4:42 pm AEDT

Re: My partner is tired of capitalism

I’m also lost @chibam

I asked him about the genie bottle wishes and he said

1 - money to pay the mortgage so he can retired
2 - that our puppy could be trained fast and easy
3- be able to eat and don’t get fat

It’s not bad wishes, I would also asked for money. Who wouldn’t? Haha

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