Hey @Shirazchurch
It sounds like you are dealing with a lot of stress at the moment, and this can be tricky to navigate when you're already in such a tough headspace. I'm sorry to hear that you haven't had the best run recently. To have good moments in your life constantly overshadowed by something horrible can't be easy, and it seems like you just can't catch a break.
It's great to hear that you are taking the steps to make things right, although, I know how disappointing this must feel when it seems like nothing is changing. You have taken a brave step reaching out on the forums tonight, and I'm curious to know what kind of support you're looking for from the community?
Please know you are not alone, and if you are needing a safe space to untangle some of those difficult thoughts and feelings further, you can always connect with Beyond Blue for free and confidential support 24/7.
Take care!