I am Me

hi @Rhymster it's nice to see you again 😊

i hear you. it's isolating when we don't feel truly seen/heard/understood by the people around us. i hope that knowing you're not alone in those feelings helps you feel a lil less lonely.

💛

For the most part I feel invisible I know I will never matter

That sounds like a really lonely space to be in @Rhymster we see you here, and I've seen you start to engage with other threads and offer support and solidarity, which is very meaningful to the community. Thank you for being here

Thank you for making Me feel welcome

Oh, @Rhymster , I can identify with what you said about feeling different to people around me and feeling so lost and alone in crowds.

I noticed as a teenager that if I was in a social group/crowd, I would often feel so much more depressed and dark thinking afterwards. Once I realised that, I now take a lot of consideration about what large-group social occasions I attend.

I occasionally find people I "click" with. And its not because they are similar to me in interests, but because they are accepting and authentic people who talk about meaningful things. I dont feel I have enough of those people in my life, but I am glad to have a few even if I dont get to talk to them often.

Do you know what makes you feel so different to others? Is it just a feeling? Or are there thoughts that you can articulate about it?

You dont have to answer, but I am curious. I love understanding how other people think.

For one my mind is always blank no pictures or sounds I don't even dream and sleep less than others

Also I have always hated physical contact even as a toddler and have spent considerable effort to assure people don't touch Me

I know a few people who dont like physical contact either. I sometimes like physical contact - but it really depends on who and what. I like hugs from trusted friends/family. And I like massage because it reduces my physical pains - does that count?

A silent mind would sometimes be nice for me I think. Mine is always thinking about something, even if its a calm thinking.

I dont get mental images much though, that I can relate to. I cant really picture even the people I live in the house with!

@Rhymster what do you see as core to your identity and life values?

I like those values too @Rhymster . 😊

I also value loyalty, honesty, respect, non-aggression/non-violence (understanding that defence is different). 😊

I choose not to tell lies, to the degree that I won't even tell "little white lies" for social grace! I will instead avoid answering a question if I don't think the person wants to know what I really think; but if I think they do want to know even if its not comfortable for them, then I will seek the kind and caring way to answer them.