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Slipping back

Jazzy1Casual Contributor28 Feb 2017, 10:11 pm AEDT

Slipping back

I spent 3 weeks in hospital in September due to severe depression & anxiety & self harm thoughts. I came out a new person putting the structure & techniques I learnt into real life. I stopped drinking took up a gym membership, ate healthy, went to bed at reasonable hour and lost 23 kgs.

The past couple of weeks I have been up & down again. Going okay & then going through another day tears & anxious. I am scared I'm going back into the black hole. I am just trying to keep one foot in front of the other & its 4 weeks till I see my psychiatrist.

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In response to: Slipping back

utopiaSenior Contributor02 Mar 2017, 6:51 pm AEDT

Re: Slipping back

@Jazzy1.
Would you like to talk here a bit about how you are feeling?
You could ask us for advice or ask us just to listen.
Sometimes it can be helpful to say things out loud or write / type them down.
LifeLine, BeyondBlue, Suicide Call Back, may also be good to talk to.
I know it's not the same as your gp or psychiatrist, but it may help.

In response to: Slipping back

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 3:32 pm AEDT

Re: Slipping back

hello @Jazzy1 @utopia

when you are at that stage it can feel very painful, overwhelming, all consuming

sometimes if you can let yourself cry, even if this is something that you normally stop yourself from doing, go somewhere where you feel safe and start to let some of that grief go

it will be difficult at first, perhaps feel strange if you havent done this before, you will be safe no matter how hard you cry, sob, wail.

You will be perfectly safe, pent up feelings, emotions will be emerging.

You are still in control even if you dont feel as though you are

you will feel very drained afterwards, perhaps sadder, empty even these too are perfectly safe reactions

if this is all too much as Utopia mentioned make a phone call, remember they cant see you, they dont know you, again you will be safe

sane helpline is another option 1800 187263 this can be found in the top righthand corner of the page

you are in a safe place on this forum

people will respond to you

please dont feel that you are having to deal with this all by yourself

take care

keep writing

In response to: Slipping back

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 6:10 pm AEDT

Re: Slipping back

Hi @Jazzy1

Sorry for replying so late. I was discharged from hospital last year in September too. I had learnt a bit but was going up and down all the time - I have complex PTSD so now I think it will be a while before I find stability in my life.

Anyway, a few weeks ago I started to feel very upset again and eventually decided that it would be good to go back to process a few things and learn new techniques and ask questions about the areas where I was seeing that I was slipping. I tried hard to do that with my support team (psychiatrist, therapist, GP) but it just didn't work so eventually my psychiatrist and me agreed on a short admission. It was the right decision. I'm home again now and I feel the difference.

Try everything you can to sort out your "slip back", utilise support people (ask your psychiatrist for an earlier appointment or cancellation list), but if worst comes to worst, get re-admitted. I didn't regret it, but I did go in with a plan of what the biggest hurdles were for me in the outside life. I was also very conscious of keeping my stay as short as possible because I feel the impact of a lengthy hospital stay on my wellbeing and ability to go back to day to day living is significant.

I wish you all the very best and keep posting here, we're all here for each other! Take care x

In response to: Slipping back

utopiaSenior Contributor03 Mar 2017, 6:27 pm AEDT

Re: Slipping back

Welcome home @Former-Member.♥

In response to: Slipping back

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 6:54 pm AEDT

Re: Slipping back

Thank you @utopia 🌺

In response to: Slipping back

Jazzy1Casual Contributor04 Mar 2017, 2:03 pm AEDT

Re: Slipping back

Thanks again everyone for your support & advice. I got an appointment with my psychologist Monday. I don't feel as bad today but my moods so up and down. Yesterday I had a moment where I thought I might crack a bottle of wine lucky I didn't do it. I,lol just keep riding the ups & downs as I can't afford time off work to go back to hospital.

In response to: Re: Slipping back

Unknown userMember04 Mar 2017, 2:45 pm AEDT

Re: Slipping back

hello @Former-Member @Jazzy1 @utopia

I agree with everything that you have said, today

A couple of weeks ago I probably would have had ambivalent feelings

It took 3 different people to tell me a hospital stay would help

I too will be working hard at utitlising all of that free time, without expectations, to come up with some strategies and discuss these with my psychiatrist whilst I am in there.

I also do not want to stay in there for long because it does take so long to readjust back into the real world.

also I have hibernated for some time now as well, only seeing certain people, as in family, occasional friend events.

This too takes its toll even though is helpful in looking after oneself.

Thank you for putting into words exactly what I have been thinking because it takes a lot to get me to accept hospital.

take care xxxx

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