Ask Anything Monday!

I started counselling today but I'm not sure we really mesh. How do I know if it's her or if I'm just reacting to things I don't want to hear? How many sessions does it take to decide that you don't mesh?

Thanks !

I'm going to say this goes two ways - depending on your illness and how you are as a person (primarily) but also I think who sent you to the specialist can play a part in how you feel about the experience.

Most people I know who suffer illness (be it physical as well as MI), are nervous to some extent about a new specialist and this can be for a number of reasons - unknown diagnosis, fear of hearing bad/unexpected bad news and general anxiety over the 'assessment/examination'.

But I feel that seeing a specialist like a psychiatrist is particularly nerve-racking and more so if this specialist is not on referral from your treating Doctor. Mostly because referrals from a treating GP are with a written referral letter so your Doctor is in-charge of the material sent to the specialist and you are usually present when he does his letter. There is probably also some choice over which specialist, so for those of us with 'complex' psychiatric illnesses and/or comorbid issues you would find most 'good' and understanding GPs will take some time to refer their patients to a specialist who is not just a specialist but also one who understands complex issues - last thing your Doctor wants is to send you to some 'quack' who is going to say it's all in your head and there is nothing wrong with you. And believe me they exist !

Also I think that a first time session can definitely define how you feel about your therapist initially - and that initial experience can have you thinking you won't return - and that's completely OK. We do meet people and know straight away we don't click. But also I think we meet a therapist and can be confused and this is a very personal thing - more time is involved and that's OK too. Then sometimes we meet a therapist and everything is great - and that, of course, is OK too. It's important to remember you need to feel comfortable with your therapist and if your gut feeling is it's not right, then you have a choice who you see and you can seek a new referral to another specialist.

It's such a personal thing. I don't believe, personally, that any specialist gets a complete understanding of a new patient within that initial hour or two. Especially with multiple mental illnesses, and it can take months into years for those patients that have trauma/anxiety spectrum disorders - like those who suffer PTSD, etc. I do believe that comorbid issues where you have depression, anxiety, trauma, and extending to physical issues as well then it's a long-term therapy which may mean multiple specialists and a multi-faceted treatment plan - ie Doctor, therapist, specialists as well as alternative or other treatment providers like physio and often extending into lifestyle changes and family/relationship therapy.

I will say that the time of settling in to treatment is different for all of us with therapists. I've been very fortunate in the long term, but I've also walked out of a specialist appointment knowing I would not return and I believe I made the right choice. I just knew. I also take in to account cost, travelling time, safety of parking, and how the specialist takes changes - can they accommodate you as a patient during tough times and are their staff/reception reliable and effectively communicate appointments and process payments. I have not seen a specialist cos their staff were incompetent - losing appointments, not able to explain the specialist's times and availability, not passing on messages and the like - so yeah I didn't see that one. I have memory issues - I need to have staff that pass on messages, process my payments/refunds, don't screw up appointments and can tell me when the specialist is available.

I'm fussy LOL - well not really, I expect the people to be able to do their job efficiently, cos I'm too unwell to be mucked around with. I re-arrange my entire week to attend a session time, and it's not always feasible to change at short notice or to turn up and find out they got it wrong. No thank you - I'll find one who suits me and does more help than harm!

I wish you well.

JJ.

Good morning everyone. There were some wonderfully thoughtful and helpful responses to last weeks Ask Anything Monday. You're setting the bar high here 🙂 Thanks to @Mazarita, @kenny66, @Former-Member, @JackJane for taking the time to share your thoughts and experiences.

Here is this weeks question:

I have a super power… it’s call ‘emotional intelligence’ in which I can make someone feel comfortable quite quickly and they feel comfortable to disclose their feelings to me very quickly. I can relate to people really easily, regardless of their personality. Don’t worry, I don’t use this power for evil :), most people say they feel better after talking to me. I’ve often been told I should be a counsellor or psychologist, but the issue is that I often can relate so well to someone that I take on their pain/anger/etc. Is there a way to put a shield up so I can be helpful, but not be drained, upset and/or overwhelmed after these encounters. I find it fulfilling, but not sure If I could cope in the long term.

Its nice that you have a special ability in dealing with people.

I know a number of people who are very good in the way that you desribe as well. Quite a number of patients from the MH Clinic I attend are very empathetic.

Of course it is important to remember that only qualified professionals offer councilling services to people in need.

There are many courses available where you could further your interest in this area.

Happy Monday everyone!

A big thanks to @Former-Member & @kenny66 for your thoughtful and insightful responses.

This week's question is looking at psychosis -

Hi, I have recently experienced my first psychotic episode, which we think was triggered by a lot of stress and a traumatic experience a couple of years ago. The psychologist wants to work with me to try and recognise the early warning signs of an oncoming psychotic episode - but I can't come up with any 'warning signs' I've dealt with a lot of stress before & this didn't happen, but is it now a warning sign?

I had no idea that I was going to have an episode, but maybe it's because it was my first time. Has anyone identified their warning signs and have they been able to prevent the onset of an episode?

There is a difference between warning signs and triggers. Stress might set you off as a trigger, as it obviously has done in your case.

The warning sign for the episode though would be completely different such as a thought you cannot get out of your head, different smells paranoia, hallucinations or some abnormality in your usual routines.

Having said that I cant always predict a psychotic episode as some of mine can have a quick onset.

I try and keep a support mechanism around me, which you can work out with your psychologist, to help both with onset and the episode itself.

Hi I'm new here and I would like to know how I can post content (poetry, start discussions, ect)?

Hi @BrokenHeart , welcome to the Forums! To start a new discussion, click on "Lived Experience Forum" at the top of this page. Then you'll see a list of topics: "Our experiences", "Looking after our wellbeing", etc. Click on the topic most relevant for your discussion and at the top of the page that opens you'll see a little green speech bubble with the words "new discussion". Click on that and write your post. Happy posting!

@kenny66

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