Psychic readings addiction - recovery

Hi @Apar.

Firstly, welcome to the forums.

Life can be unpredictable, and not knowing what's ahead can be scary. It seems like these psychic readings were a way for you to gain some control and predictability over knowing what's ahead and feeling less overwhelmed.

Have you ever reached out to a therapist, counsellor or psychologist before? These professionals can help you find healthier ways to feel reassured. It also seems like finding a partner is something that's provoking a lot of anxiety in you - it might be a topic to explore with a professional as well.

You have shown a lot of strength in reaching out here. We're here for you.

That's great to hear that you're working with a psychologist already @Apar. Have you both explored 'reframing' thought patterns?

@holdinghope5 I’ve been trying different techniques for generalised anxiety, and the reassurance . Tried reframing thoughts with the help of 3 column method. Another psychologist recommended getting more hobbies. I’m not 100% sure I’m heading right way in terms to therapy with psychologists. Considering my Indian background lot of pressure is put by family back home to marry any reasonable arranged marriage proposal. They don’t want to hear answers like I don’t find connection with him. He is ticking boxes do get married. These act as triggers, the psychic loop worsens. Having said that I have a loving family back home in india, but their ideologies around marriage don’t align with mine. I also feel lonely as first generation migrant. Loneliness also triggered this assurance seeking in the first place

hey @Apar my parents are from India too, and they've used similar services before.

it sounds like finding a partner is something that's been overwhelming you a lot, do you use the psychic services mainly for information around your future partner or other aspects too?

i know what you mean about the pressures of finding a partner, i've seen so many of my family/cousins experience it. my own mother got an arranged marriage and although she's okay with it now, she's also advised me to take my time and enjoy my single life, and to be careful with who i choose to share my life with. at the end of the day, it's you who'll be spending day and night with the partner you choose, not your family. i know it's really uncomfortable and hard to go against what our parents want, but they aren't the ones who suffer the consequences of our actions - we do.

are there any other things you can place your focus on? whether it's travel, work, friends, hobbies, goals, etc?

hi, yes I mostly use it in relation to marriage , finding a partner . It has not helped that I was not succesful in finding someone in so many years. I socialise at every opportunity, I signed up to different activities on meetup. Through meetups I made lot of friends . Cultivated hobbies played tennis , and then currently pursuing Indian dance course . One might think when we are around people , somewhere we will find a guy whom you connect with. But it hasn’t happened . So my parents propose matches from matrimonies ( guys are mostly from India with some of them open to relocation), I sometimes get afraid if I will stay single forever . So I do pursue the matches , if I reject them , my parents remind me of this again n again . “You did not marry that guy who was a good match “- they do this because they are depressed and afraid that I will be single forever at this rate . Then I ask I psychic if I did the right thing by not going ahead with that person . They say yes , you will find your Man by yourself. You will find him in Australia itself. Ps. I’m 35 yrs old.

it sounds like you've put yourself out there and tried really hard to connect with people, but no one's 'clicked' yet @Apar. i absolutely hear you, the pressure can be really intense from family and i can see why they're worried, it's clear that they care about you a lot too.

if you stay single, what would be happen? i'm not saying you will stay single forever, but i do wonder why your parents feel this way? i know for some of my cousins, they were worried about 'what others will say' and family reputation. for some, they were worried for financial reasons or even fear of being alone.

so it seems like the psychic's validation that you've made the right choice is what makes you feel better? is this psychic trustworthy? in my experience, there are A LOT of psychics who have used people's fears/vulnerabilities to make money, and then there are a few genuine psychics. so please do be careful. even things that some psychics share aren't necessarily 'set in stone', it's usually a guide to help you make your own choices.

you know yourself better than the psychic and probably better than your parents know you. i'm also curious, what are some reasons you've rejected these potential matches?

p.s. you can tag people you want to reply to by using the @ symbol and typing out the username and selecting it. members will only be notified of your response if you tag them, it'll look like this @Apar - hope this helps!

@rav3n @Thanks for the tip.

I feel I’m losing a lot of many on psychics, it’s effecting both my mental and financial health . What we psychics say in terms of timing never happened . Like it happens in 3 months, this year etc never came true . So I know all logical things to get rid of the readings . But somehow my limbic system / dopamine hit is pulling me when I’m vulnerable / triggered . As a desperate attempt to get rid of the psychics I came to this forum . Most of the time, just a meaningful answer from a peer which soothes the trigger , circle in the brain ( instead of a psychic) - hoping.

Coming to why I rejected , I have always excelled in education , career so the bar is slightly high . But I have been reasonable enough to find an understanding guy . I rejected a guy recently because , he seemed to not have an opinion on things . He did not ask any questions about me , or how our marriage would be . He was just asking if I had food, what did I have for lunch/ dinner , good morning, good night texts. My parents perspective was he is working in similar field as mine ( IT) , he is ready to relocate from india to Aus after marriage , he is fine looks wise . I agree with all these points. But I feel he is from orthodox background who never stepped outside of comfort zone , never washed a dish , did his own laundry ( since he had family taking care with the help of house helps we get in India) . Plus I don’t feel he is trying to make a connection with me , he is ok to marry me since he is already 40 years old , there is astrological match ( as per his family) .

no worries! @Apar

i see what you mean, that must be really tough. i'm really glad that you've reached out here, the community here is amazing and you're always welcome to pop in and share. there'll be an evening social chat tonight (and on Sat and Sun evenings too) where you can connect with other members and be supported.

have you tried journalling as well? i find that if there's no one around to talk to, journalling is the next best thing at calming down my thoughts.

in my opinion, those reasons for rejection are quite valid! if they're not asking questions back, if they don't share similar views or interests, it makes sense why you'd turn them down. you sound like you've accomplished a lot and worked hard to get here, so it would make sense to want someone who's on a similar page. in all honesty, the social views from people who grew up in India can be quite different to ones who grew up in Australia. have you looked into finding partners from other western countries like the US, Canada, UK, etc. ?

@Apar thank you for sharing. I share a similar experience and can relate a little. I wouldn't say that I was addicted, but I was looking for answers.

In 2022, I was working as a Ghost and Paranormal Tour Guide on the weekends for a friend who owned the business. And I went to my first psychic medium show. I was intrigued and felt like it answered some of the questions that I had. So, I signed up to his online community. He was a psychic medium and energetics coach.

He would hose sessions over zoom, we would attend workshops like interpreting your dreams, understanding energetics, and understanding intuition. I attended a conference - a whole four day intensive workshop - with him in QLD.

At that workshop, I had a one-on-one session and he offered me a job. He wanted to design a program for children/teens on understanding emotions as energy and on using their intuition. He has big plans of taking it through the education system in QLD.

What he offered me was hope. I was burnt out, struggling with my mental health and had a lot of intense SI. I had a plan. He gave me hope for the first time in a long time and I took it and ran with it.

I quit my teaching job, packed my things and moved interstate. I lived with a person who was also in the group, who attended the conference and had also just completed the move interstate. But, I didn't know her well and the living situation become emotionally and mentally abusive. At times, I was afraid for my physical safety and for the safety of my dog.

My mental health became worse and I was completely alone and separated from my family. I had also realised that the job offer wasn't going to eventuate.I had some one-on-one sessions with my coach/psychic and his advice was to stick it out.

Last year, I attended a retreat with him and a small group of people in Fiji, where we learnt about meditation for connection, somatics and magnetising our future. But when I decided to go against his advice, when I decided to move back home and out of the toxic and unsafe environment I was living in, he basically said "good luck" and washed his hands with me.

It wasn't until I got some distance and spent some time settling back into my home state that I could see the impact it had on me. The activities we would do, would often bring on massive panic attacks, I started to have flash backs and intense nightmares and my anxiety had sky-rocketed to the point where it was controlling me. And the future that had given me hope has completely disappeared. I'm still trying to figure out what my future looks like and what I want to do with it.

Essentially, it wasn't his intention, but he was retraumatising me and unlocking memories that I didn't even know I had and he didn't have the training and the skills to realise what was happening, or how to support me.

I have decided to go down the counselling, psych, mental health and well being journey - which is the one I should have taken in the first place. I am still picking up the pieces. I'm still angry and hurt and trying to process it. I have a lot of feelings of abandonment, of failure, of uncertainty about the future. I am still trying to rebuild relationships with my family and have a lot of guilt about leaving them when things were happening in their lives and for missing thirteen months of their lives. I exploded my teaching career, lost my stable housing and my friendships and support circle and I'm trying to rebuild my relationship with my family after thirteen months away, trying to figure out what my future looks like and whether I want to rebuild my teaching career.

I've just started my mental health recovery journey, and it's a process.