Functioning with ADHD

@Glisten it’s so complicated having BP2 because my pdoc doesn’t want me on meds for ADHD. So I am naturally looking for another alternative to balance my brain chemistry. It’s tough, but I am not seeing many options. I guess I could try the herbal route. Not being able to do things isn’t helping with PTSD and OCD ruminations, it may be indirectly de-stabilising bipolar through added stress. If not meds, I need something. If I don’t find a reasonable solution, I fear I may turn to unhelpful coping methods

@Glisten people say Bipolar is progressive, but I certainly don’t want it to be that way. I’m hoping with treatment I’m able to prevent worsening. ADHD has become more prominent with age. Adulthood is more demanding.
You need to make a mental note of everything, including medical appointments and payments. I found studying really hard last year with uni. Tertiary studies are very demanding, work is demanding. I’m not currently work right now, I’m unemployed and looking for work. There is so much competition, and society favours NTs. Now I’m struggling to manage job applications, keeping up with cleaning, and even relaxing activities. Everything feels too much effort. I don’t even know how I’ll manage a job, it’s so hard to concentrate. There are things I can do, instead I end up paralysed ruminating over things. I don’t want to ruminate but I feel incapable of functioning. It felt so bad today my brain entertained unhelpful coping strategy to manage distress, and I know it’s not something I can go to all the time because there are consequences. I’m okay though and safe, a single occurrence won’t do much, but repeated occurrences will.

Honestly I’ve decided moving forward, I’m going to rely on more saffron in my tea to help with organisation of the mind. It’s a way better option than using more risky methods

Some of the restlessness is beginning to return, the relief didn’t last long enough. What did I expect? I probably deserve it, I didn’t do the right thing

I hope the extra saffron helps tomorrow, I am running out of options. Maybe I need more of it for it to work with improving concentration and motivation. Once I can get my mind organised I’ll be calmer. I have to find my neurotransmitters other ways besides meds.

I have wasted so much time. I have wasted years, and still can’t get out of this rumination

@Glisten last night was really rough, I found relief for a while, for the symptoms to return later. I developed really bad SI and intrusive images, and spent the night crying and also reached out to a helpline through chat. I was too overwhelmed to talk. Maybe I made a bit of a mess out of things. I am better today, but it is still hard

Great job reaching out last night @creative_writer! Don't hesitate to make the call to speak with someone again today if you need a little extra support. Thanks for updating the community 🙂

What are your plans for today that might help you get through?

RiverSeal ❤️