Where to start…

Hello @SupportiveSis and welcome to the forums. I'm really sorry to hear what's been happening lately and I can only imagine the toll it's taking on your family.

Have you thought about getting your brother to see a Gp? They can provide referrals to counsellors/psychologists so that diagnoses can be made and therapy can be offered.

Helping someone that's struggling with issues can be really hard. The option for therapy for you and your family is also there, getting support for yourselves is important too.

I hope the community has got some other suggestions for you aswell. You are not alone and we are here to help however we can. Take care of yourself ❤️

Typically a hospitalisation includes an exit plan. Like resources in the community or future appointments that have been made

Follow up with these organisations to start with - they are targeted to deal with people in similar situations.

For underlying issues then a medical referral from GP is required.

My strong recommendation is to put up clear boundaries - even at the risk booting him out of home . You / your family can only take so much.

@SupportiveSis

I have been a supportive sis in family with complex and multiple people with mental health issues. Not an easy road to tread. Keep looking after you.

For your parents: there are carers organisations these days. Not sure which state you are in but Tandem and Carers Victoria are 2 services in that field.

The insights of family therapy are often underestimated in the modern mental health narratives.

Regarding your brother, there is only so much anyone can do to help another person. In the end he has to help himself. Yes, boundaries and limits around problematic behaviour can help. Don’t give any support on illegal and harmful behaviour.

But I also understand the parental urge and duty to love, protect and provide. I have been told a few times to throw my son out by people who couldn’t be bothered to understand our family’s historical complexities. I am glad I did not. Only your family can truly decide what is best for you. It’s tricky balancing competing needs. Focus on needs rather than wants.

My best bet is to focus on respect and his personal dignity and genuine self love with tough love thrown in for good measure. Distinguish that from indulgent immature and selfish or self destructive behaviour. Narcissism is on the internet a lot and maybe is not the best model. I looked into the Greek mythology and philosophy and psychoanalysis. Sometimes selfish and self destructive are convoluted and twisted together.

Just hoping he slowly finds the better side of his nature and your family finds a way to thrive.