@AuntGlow last night I woke up in a panic after a nightmare, it was very full on and I couldn't get through to a crisis service. Thankfully my friend was awake at the same time so I was able to chat with her which helped to calm me down. I also woke up to Casper on top of me cos he could sense that something wasn't right.
I had my counsellor appointment today and had to be really careful about what I said to her. She said that the service isn't right for me and can't support me with my needs when it comes to the therapy that I require. But in saying that she isn't going to leave me without support. Even the other appointment that I have coming up with the therapeutic counsellor isn't going to be the right support for me. So she is still keeping appointments but she is going to talk to the team leader and find out what services can provide long term support and the proper support for me.
I'm feeling emotional about it cos I struggle with that fear of rejection from yet another service but I know it's not the case here, but rather she is doing everything she can to help me.
I was also asked the heavy question of whether I have a plan with regards to suicide which is always hard to talk about (I'm safe for the moment).
I also tried to sort out financial help to see a dentist but I've been unsuccessful in getting through yet. My tooth is painful and it's getting worse so I'm really hoping that I can get through tomorrow and that they can actually help.
Glad you are well. The cold definitely affects motivation but I prefer the cold weather than warmer weather. It's been pouring here most of the day and I've loved it.
