Battles

@MissGremlin

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@MissGremlin wrote:

Yeah I didn't think it was a question that should have been asked, like they wanted graphic details. It was the fact that even after I said that I didn't want to talk about it anymore that they kept on going.

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I really struggle to understand why a) anyone would think it's helpful, or even okay, to ask for graphic details... or b) would even think they need to know! Baffling. And then not to take the hint after you said, quite rightly, that you didn't want to talk about it.

@MJG017 haha to losing hours to your game, but at least it was productive 😂.

Well i can certainly see how you could write 8 pages on those questions. Some of them require alot of detail so I think the more the better in those instances. It definitely shows that you have a sound understanding and can respond to what's asked in such great detail. I think even I could get quite carried away with responding to those questions and that's just based on real life experiences.

Well done for getting it done 😊

@MJG017 my first thought was, what person would want to know the in's and outs of what happened. Like a person says they've been sexually and physically assaulted isn't that enough of an explanation. When reaching out and speaking about something like this you already feel incredibly vulnerable and it's incredibly hard to talk about so to be pressured into giving graphic details or your request of not talking about it anymore ignored, it really just makes you feel like sh!t. Just makes reaching out again that much harder.

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@Glisten wrote:

@rav3n your information is not very accurate. Here have some Neil. @MissGremlin

https://youtu.be/dBwNadry-TU?si=TvuTVlR20rhj0yTu

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just watched this now, thanks for sharing!! is it bad that i'm slightly disappointed that i can't just blame the moon for my mood changes anymore?😅 interesting learning about the buldge though, love the way Neil explains things @Glisten

@MJG017 yeah I think being comprehensive is good! Like unless you are going to get marked down for going over a word limit, 8 pages is fine!! Besides, even if it's deemed 'unnecessary' or whatever (tho I doubt it) it's still good practice! Good on you 😁

I'm going pretty well! Just got back from a week up in NSW staying with fam. Beach is always nice hehe. How you been going?

@MissGremlin I reckon it's grounds for a complaint, honestly. But I know you've got a million spinning plates already so obviously you gotta put your energy where it's needed. Almost feels like this worker was seeing you as a case study, not as a vulnerable person in crisis.

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@MissGremlin wrote:

Yeah they are still pretty new to me and i haven't found anything that works really, like I'm sometimes able to bring myself back into the present briefly but then lose myself again. I try to focus on things around me and name the colour of things, texture etc. Sometimes I'll hold something to try and keep myself present. But it's really hit and miss with whether something works or not.

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Definitely a lot of trial and error in the early days of developing a new coping strategy. One of my friends also uses little mantras, saying aloud to herself stuff like "I am not there, I am safe in my home" or "no matter how real it feels it will pass, as it always does" - just stuff to continue to remind herself that she's safe.

Other sensory grounding tools might help? Like a spiky mat or super hot or cold shower, basically something that is a small 'shock' to the system to give it something else to grab onto I guess

@Jynx yeah I really don't have the energy for a complaint. It's the fact that it's triggered me again that I hate. Trying to switch my thoughts off at the moment but not having much luck. Just kind of sitting here staring at my phone, not feeling particularly grounded right now.

@Jynx yeah it is. I try hard to tell myself that I'm safe but it's so hard when you are going in and out of reality basically. Like even focusing on things around me sometimes I start seeing things that aren't in that moment but were in those other moments (if that makes sense).

The hot/cold showers has never worked for me, I do try holding different sensory things. But yeah it's still very much trying to learn what works, most of the time there's just nothing i can do but wait for it to pass and just making sure my area is safe.

Aye @MissGremlin your energy is precious, but I hope there's a sense of validation in the fact that I think not only is it worth a complaint, but that this is a person who potentially should be pulled from the service until they can be trained properly, because that is basics of trauma-informed care that they've failed at, and for a crisis service that is downright dangerous.

*pulls off professional hat, puts regular peer support/silly lil guy hat back on*

I'm reassured to hear that you are still putting effort into grounding when you can, even though sometimes it doesn't work and lawwwwd that is so frustrating hey. I've had to learn to really push myself to keep going with some strategies, even though part of my brain is absolutely adamant that "It's not working, must be cos I'm so crap at everything, so might as well stop trying". Be proud of your persistence 😊

Okay, I'm about to ramble at you but I do not at all expect you to read the following right now unless you're able, cos I know flashbacks make the 'focusing on new info' very difficult. Feel free to ignore it, and instead, you wanna tell me a bit about your space? I'm so curious, like do you have art hanging up and stuff?

~

Another idea for a grounding strat - I like to sing to myself!! Tho I am not plagued by visceral/visual flashbacks, just body/emotional ones and dissociation, so your mileage may vary with this one. It's a little more involved than just noticing things, which helps keep me more focused, and it's an auditory stim to help tie me to the present. Singing also stimulates the vagus nerve - the big guy that runs right on down the middle of us (and is responsible for activating/deactivating our survival response) is attached to the vocal chords, and since singing involves lots of soothing vibrations and deep breathing, it can actually help us bring our bodies back into regulation 😌

@rav3n I don’t ask for much out of life. A vocation that brings me happiness and an income, independence, a place to call my own, a 4x4 Ute, and an astrophysicist, anaesthetist or a real life Brigadier General Jack O’Neill to marry me.

They are my only needs 😆