Life can be a Pain

Hi @Former-Member

I don't know how much of your post was your letter to your friend and how much was for us - but one thing I know in this world is that there are no right words for anything like this - nothing that can console - but the truth lies in that we write - that we get in touch with people and let them know we care

After my son died our house was full of flowers - none from my family but from all the organisations and people my then-h were involved in - and we lived completely different lives so it was pretty amazing

But I found the letters I received the best - and you have written and added scripture - which can never hurt if she is a believer - and I would add that "The sufferings in this world are nothing compared with the glory to come" - which I think is from one of St Peter's epistles and then - "In my father's house there are many mansions - if this was not the case would I have told you that I have come to take you to myself" - which is from St. John's Gospel - and I know that one is often read at funeral services but the outlook for brain cancer must be grim - and knowing that God has prepared a place for us - and it is for us alone - that is really fantastic

You seem to know the OT better than I do - I have read the NT more - but still - I will have you and your friend in my prayers

My the Lord bless and keep you -

Dec

✝

Hi @outlander

I have that appointment in less than three hours - I feel physically uncomfortable - but emotionally okay - the good thing is I haven't had a phone call cancelling it

Hi @Former-Member

You are right - life can be so unfair - the base of it is that nothing we can do here can be the be-all and cure-all - life is just what it is - the best of people can suffer terribly while it can sometimes seem as if the worst can get away with things -

Life the luck of the draw with smoking - some people get cancer and other's don't - how do we work that out? Actually we can't

My gripe

My stars - yesterday in the supermarket I was nearly skittled by a child who suddenly ran fast around the corner into the aisle and (she was so little) nearly ran into me - and if I had not moved quickly I could have fallen onto her and she would have been hurt - as indeed would I have. As it was the sudden movement caused me a lot of pain - I have it still

But I am ashamed - I yelled "DON'T RUN!!!" really loudly - and scared her - I didn't see what happened because I just collapsed over the trolley - but the woman I was with saw - ands the mother picked the child up and was comforting her and she glared at me apparently - and later the mother had put the child into the trolley with her younger child - but still

As badly as I feel I know I would do the same again - I am vulnerable in such places yet I feel as if I have the right everyone has to be their and select my own shopping - small children should be minded by their parents and not allowed to run around like that

If I had fallen onto that child it could have been so much worse. I didn't sleep well thinking about it - and felt shame - shame that I yelled at a very small child and shame that I would do the same again

Really bad - and another part of me says I have the right to defend myself and falling - esp onto a small child - would have been far worse - yes - I am glad I am seeing my pain-specialist today

Dec - sore as

Yes - it feels like this - but my specialist is a woman and I don't rap-dance

good luck with your appointment @Owlunar let me know how you go

hello loveley @Former-Member

im busy busy busy- i updated my hospital thread if youd like to take a look. i not long got out of my gp and im finally being taken seriously but i wont right too much on here even though im sure Dec doesnt mind but its easier to read it off there and then respond whereever you like instead of writing it everywhere lol

im trying to think of something new to do- esp my rawing im kinda out of ideas at the moment, but i have been studying as well so thats abit of occupying where i can

yeah ive got a horse who has an eye ulcer at the moment and is taking up quite alot of my time as it ahve to tend to her three-5 times a day in among doing everything else .

im sorry to hear your in so much pain too- ahve you tried a heat pack or hot water bottle with some pain relief- i do that when my slipped disk and scoliosis is worse than usual..

Hi @outlander and @Former-Member

I am back from my pain specialist - it went very well - she is very pleased and is glad I have dropped so much medication and I can take a little more of a couple if I need to - which could be the case during the winter

That child in the supermarket - that could have been so much worse - at least I was seeing my pain specialist this morning and I could tell her these are the unexpected things that happen - and she understood that.

I am such a bright sunshiney person when I am talking to people - I was glad to see her - she is so nice and she is not changing anything atm - which is cool - and assure me I could cut some of my medication if I chose but she is not cutting any thing out herself - that's a relief.

Lapses - I do have crutches that I used a lot in the past - maybe I will need in the future - they are fore-arm crutches - easy to manage - I don't use them now - but I have had people be very rude when I am using them - and at the clinic - there were other people worse off with their mobilty than I am - walkers, crutches, canes - and all moving so slowly - it is not measure of their pain but their ability to manage - definitely -

I was an athlete and the same mind is running the same body - so I did the best for myself for most of my life - I am pretty strong

Dec

Yes @outlander

I use heat for my back - when I got back from the supermarket yesterday I got the heat pack - I was going to sleep watching Star Trek so I left the DVR recording and went to bed - and went to sleep until about 9.00pm - then I could watch everything I had recorded - there was a horrible movie on - I do not like dark crime movies - there is something freaky about them

Your horse does have a bad eye - and does need that treatment - you have a lot to do but I am sure that horse is a top priority along with your Pop - and I will check your hospital thread in a moment

@Former-Member

I am not in a hurry to get any other aids for walking - when my parents went into aged care my mother was fine - but they gave her a A-Frame and she was dependent upon it straight away and I felt badly about that - not necessary. Okay - maybe the place needed to have her using it for their insurance but if I was told I had to use one of those I would be pushing it with my finger tips unless I was really bad - I hate those A-Frames - they make me sea-sick - honestly

Dec

Wow @Former-Member - that's terrific that your daughter's article was in the Compassionate Friends Newsletter - my son's story had a front page article years ago - I remember how it felt - great feeling

I don't belong now - and I don't get the newsletter or cards - there was something I couldn't handle anymore - and it was really painful for me - but I cancelled out. I was a volunteer for a while and wrote those cards that people get at anniversaries - and I would sit there and be really thoughtful about what I wrote - and there was an emptiness in the cards I received - I think my son's life and death were so complicated nothing really touched the pain there - still doesn't - and it's no one's fault - just the way things are

I'm glad you went to the Riverside March - I did go to things like that in the past - in a few weeks it will be his 31st anniverary - time does heal a lot - it's true - but there are things time doesn't heal - but I guess naturally I moved on - one must make room for those to come - that's life

Dec

Thanks @Dec, re CF article, its nice to be validated and told we have 'a way with words' that can help others.

I'm pleased for you that your biannual specialist apt went well and she's a nice person and helpful. Nothing to worry about. And I'm also very impressed that you've reduced your pain meds yourself - well dine, I know that's hard to do.

With mobility aids, apart from trying to be funny (cheer you up, see edited post image), no offense intended. I was wondering if using at least a walking stuck in public might cause people to take more care, esp with their kids, that's all. But I wholeheartedly support the concept of independence as long as possible. Gotta duck up the library. Here's another cute pic.

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