@D1ng0 absolutely! It's an ongoing struggle. As an example, I had to pay something and all weekend I have been meaning to look at the invoice and pay it. I finally did and then realised I only had until Tuesday until it was actually due. So I paid it and have since spent a good hour berating myself for leaving it 'to the last minute', even though it isn't even the last minute! But it's something I had avoided and, just like you, I feel anxious about stuff I 'should' have done. I 'should' have been more organised.
I try to remind myself that I would never betrate someone I cared about. I was having a good talk to my brother who, since my autism diagnosis, has begun to self-identity because we both struggle with something my child also struggles with: pathological demand avoidance. We know we need to do the thing, we may even know when a thing needs to be done by and that there is a sense of urgency attached to it, but anxiety gets right in the way, or we feel pressured. It's not something intentional.
I guess what I am getting at is have self-compassion. I know that's difficult, but brains are tricky things and no one would actively choose to get themselves in knots and not do a bunch of stuff. It just happens. So celebrate the wins. It doesn't mean letting yourself off the hook, just saying 'well, today wasn't the day' and trying to get stuff done the next day, or the day after that.
I also have to acknowledge in myself and it might be the same for you that perfectionism means I hold standards for myself that are way too high. I know this because I don't hold anyone else up to them. I am also the sort of person who gets stuff done in a flurry, or through hyper focus and I need down time because of that. Sure, I wish things were different but this is me and how things are and things still do get done, doesn't matter how.
Be kind to yourself.
