Loss & Grief

Hey @Arma

I'm sorry for you loss and pain. It sounds incredibly hard to manage this pain.

The grief process can look very different for people. There is no wrong or right way to grieve.

I wonder if some of those precious places you've visited together can conjure up memories for you to cherish as opposed to pushing them out?

If you are up for it, we can support you here if you want to share what this special person meant to you.

Hope you are okay.

Hearing you. You are not alone,

tyme

Hi Tyme, thank you for showing your support!
Sure, I certainly have those memories with him, though at first, it was hard when grief was the stronger emotion, but lately, I was able to think of my happy moments with him at those places when those sad memories surfaced. Some places are harder than others, maybe because they hold deeper meaning to us.

He was a person that came along when I was not looking, but now I realise that he came at the right time. Mind you, he lived in another state. I am a shy and quiet person with new people, but with him, he could provide the space for me to open up right from the first time we talked. Not once was he unsure about me, he was ready to get hurt if it meant he could get approval, he made me his priority and told his family about me, which surprised them since he's never done that before.

He was the best person I've met, different from family and friends that I met throughout my life. He made me feel love I never thought I could receive from anyone. He made me feel calm and brought me comfort just by listening to him. The constant reassurance he provided me when I was feeling in doubt about myself or when we encountered a problem was what made me want to keep going even though I was scared that we would get hurt again.

Moving on from him was one of the hardest thing I had to do, we both respected to not keep in contact to not make it harder for us. But when he passed away, I found out that he kept asking about me to his close mate, who is also my cousin, he said he still had deep feelings for me, made me his motivation to stay in Australia when he told me he just wanted to go back to his parents before we parted ways. People where he lived asked about my condition to my cousin when he passed away, and that made me feel so loved like he once did.

Oh god I've ranted too much, but it feels good to talk about the person that he was.

Hey @Arma ,

He sounds so so special and I hope that you can hold on to those memories. I can see how much he meant to you, but I can also see that you meant a lot to him too.

He did not leave you because he had someone else. You had to part ways because of the situation.

Allow yourself to grieve. Allow yourself to hold onto those precious memories. And even when you move on, it is not wrong to hang on to these precious moments.

You mentioned he popped into your life when you least expected it. Be open to whatever the future holds.

You are stronger than you think.

Thank you for trusting the community enough to share your special story.

Hugs.